Past Lives

[Cannon]

All that I myself can say about my own probable past lives is that I am almost 100% certain that I fought in what is generally called the Orion Wars. All the information I've learned of that horrific period is always filled with a sort of cheesy feeling, like everything about the Universe at that time was all one giant cliche of a space opera movie. Nothing I hear about it surprises me, so in a sense you may expect that I consider all I hear about it as boring, which is not the case. I am very certain that I enjoyed my time battling Reptillians, Draconians, and such. However, there is a lot of pain. I'm very used to the overbearing 'smugness' that the Reptillians have and seem to have received a sort of inferiority complex during my time, as well as a great respect for the intelligence/cunning of the Orion warriors. I believe, however, that the wars turned me down to a quite negative outlook. I feel that I evolved a spiritual existential crisis and, in absolute horror, began to perhaps believe that the One Glorious Infinite Creator loved the Reptillians more than the Felines and Humans. I dealt with this pain by enjoying slaughtering Negatives, I believe. At least, this is what I'm getting from synchronicities, psychic connections, and whatever else. The most helpful thing I've found about learning about past lives is where your empathy is found. Apparently empathy is only given to people with problems you yourself have faced. These two youtube links go into the type of emotions I feel resonating within me deeply.

I'm aware that this music is from a movie about fascism, and therefore very highly negative. There is an immense amount of pride and unity to be found in this collection of sounds, however:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CIGHCoVzqtk

But it is an incomplete war song, in my opinion, without an unexplainable tinge of a beautiful brotherhood amidst absolute desperation, a beautiful desperation and a beautiful despair caused by such brotherhood/tribal love, found within this particular song according to my own emotions:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzMkZChFynk

In the LOO, Ra mentioned something which resonated with me very strongly. It was that it is very possible to become "too disciplined." Too much discipline removes one's spontaneity and covers up the perfection of your being given to you by Our Creator. Too much discipline, in my opinion, is like a woman wearing too much makeup, if that makes any sense at all.

I also, as a man, feel very jealous of women. There is something within me that desperately wants to give birth again, to experience that holy moment when you first meet another perfect child who you immediately love unconditionally. Very strange for me, seeing that I am perhaps a very grizzled warrior type of guy. I have not once ever felt a serious need to enter into any military service whatsoever, by the way. In fact, I'm disgusted by what I've seen of Earth's military groups, though I very much respect those who provide service.