Has anybody here struggled with anhedonia?

[OpalE]

And thank you OpalE, for going through the trouble to post all that L/L Research stuff. I'm still reading through it, but I wanted to thank you for posting it.

No trouble. =)

I know it's a lot, but most of those had alternate techniques or context that may speak more clearly to you than i could. I figured you could skim them for anything that popped out and ignore the rest.

How do I turn my attention towards the part of me that's still connected to thw creator?

I think Carla said it better in that BBS interview: "move into your own open heart"

... i guess if i boil it down to the bones, it really comes down to finding a technique and conceptual framework (or phrasing of the idea) that makes intuitive sense to you, personally; then using that to trick yourself into believing (wholeheartedly) that it is possible. the belief only has to last long enough to get a success or two under your belt, because after that you've proven to yourself that the thing is possible, and future attempts are hella easier.

i think the above is true of most (if not all) spiritual and occult practices. They're deceptively simple; the hardest part is truly believing that they're possible without the benefit of past first-hand experience.

in this case, suppose the concept in question goes something like this:

- there is a part of each of us that is already One with all, it IS the Creator. It knows literally everything, because -- like the Creator -- it is not limited to the illusion the way our current forms (whatever they may be) are; aspects of the illusion, such as linear time and cause-and-effect (to name a couple), simply do not exist for this part of self.

if this description doesn't feel right to you, try similar concepts such as "the soul," "higher(-est) self," "holy genius," or "guardian angel;" or maybe an emissary / ambassador type such as "spirit guides."

the thing i think you need to do cure your anhedonia is establish (and maintain) contact with this part of self and 'get back on the same page' with it, using whatever method and means that make sense and feel intuitively 'right' to you, personally.

in my own personal conceptual framework, this aspect of self is the "true" self ... the only part of our beings that is actually us. everything else -- our bodies, minds, personalities, perceptions ... ALL of it --are just clothes for this eternal and timeless self.

also, according to my own conception, this part of self 'lives' in the exact center or core of our being ... so, for me, 'reaching ever inward' in a calm and relaxed state is synonymous with contacting it.

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if you were looking for a more clinical answer:

attention can be an actual, semi-tangible thing.

it can be focused, moved, held, relaxed, and called back at will to the center of the being who possesses it ... even right out from under the noses of those that know how to trap or steal it 'permanently.' (this could actually be what has happened to you. your attention could still be 'living' with the friend you lost, leaving you with a severely handicapped ability to direct and focus it -- but contacting the same aspect of self mentioned above and asking it to 'call yourself back to yourself' would still be, IMO, the solution).

The first step, for me, to understanding this and learning to control it was:

using the tip of your finger or the end of some object (like a ruler), continually trace a predictable pattern (circle, infinite sign, etc.) on some sensitive area of your skin. feel the sensation as completely as possible, focusing on and following the point where the tip meets the skin.

continue this until the mobile point of sensation seems to have developed a momentum of it's own, then lift the tip from the skin. CONTINUE following the sensation in the same pattern.

it will probably vanish at first, but -- with practice -- this technique will eventually grant the ability to spawn the sensation from nothing.

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I know i've already dropped a lot here, but i feel a need to mention one more thing.
(i don't think this is for you, but rather someone who will stumble into this thread):

the aspect of self i've mentioned above is, to me, synonymous with soul.

it is not possible for this to be 'taken,' 'stolen,' 'sold,' or 'lost.' Such ideas are tools used by deceptive forces to trap beings into enslaving themselves.

the soul IS the part of us that is capable of awareness of experience. as long as you can contemplate your own existence in this present moment, your 'soul' is still in your possession.

in other words: if you can consider that you might be soulless, you are not ... because it is the presence of soul which allows this consideration at all.


... i think that's it ( =P 'bout time, right?)

be well!