love/unity experience increases difficulty with fear/seperation

[Glow]

Hi Glow. I can so relate to some of the issues you're experiencing. I can offer you the analysis I made during my own journey. So my belief is that when we reach that love/unity consciousness and become living channels for love/light, we inadvertently increase the aperture of our energy systems. We do this out of a desire to serve. We want to ground as much of this energy into the earth web as we can. However it's very unlikely that one can maintain this consciousness indefinitely without practice. Eventually we will experience catalyst that will trigger a distortion on the lower rays, and then we have all this energy rush to that distortion, empowering it way more than before.

I experienced this first hand when I spent a few days in universal love. I thought, "this is great, I can do this all the time". Then I got triggered by something someone said, and instead of a general annoyance I experienced tremendous rage. I had enough sense not to react, but I thought it incredible sitting there with this extremely potent rage coursing through my veins. I couldn't do anything but wait for it to pass.

Then I had another time where I was meditating and I felt so many rays of love pouring out. Something happened to frighten me and I felt all those rays, hundreds of them, collapse in on themselves into pure fear energy and I got a horrible pit in my stomach from it.

Perhaps this accident you've experienced was a message for you to slow down. This dark night of the soul you're going through will help balance your energy system and give you a stronger foundation to work from in the future. Your faith will grow to out-match your fear. And if it's all becoming too much, just go away for a bit. Escape in some movies or books. Go shopping and buy some nice things. Be human for a while and put spirituality on hold for a bit. I do this all the time.

I hope what I say helps.

Thanks Loiseabell, that feels like what is happening.
It felt really good to hear it described, like a map is half fleshed out, and to be honest I cannot flesh out any map right now. So thanks for giving me that.

I am not very good at putting spirituality on hold.
Part of that cognitive disonence I mentioned in the other thread but maybe I will have to put some extra effort into trying to find a break or escape as you say. Thanks very much. ((Hug))