So much confusion, seeking clarity

[manifestgirl]

Love love love your reply. Thank you.
I actually just started watching Sadhguru videos about 1.5 weeks ago. I do agree with you, I must learn to trust my OWN intuition and
not be so ready to assume everyone understands or knows more than I do, and its ok to question and have curiosity as long as it doesn't
stifle my own growth or cause me emotional pain unnecessarily. Yet I was def attached to an outcome, one that I was praying for actually
due to my belief that the suffering on the planet would come to an end. That thought does give me peace.... I am calling forth balance in the new year
in every area of my life, with it, I believe much of my confusion will clear away on its own. I still have days where I feel heartbroken, over stuff not even involving me but it happens less and less. Guess Im growing.

thanks again
Happy New Year and New us!

I used to watch a lot of new age videos about similar things and it was causing me a lot of confusion and suffering like it seems to be causing you. Through my own journey I realised that I was identifying with this narrative that there would be a big event and things would finally change for the better. I was looking for the truth from external sources. I have learned when we do this we neglect our own connection to our own inner intuition. I realised all the new age people I was listening to really where not well balanced and adjusted people at all. The confusion that I was in was all due to attachment. All these people such as Goode and Wilcock where very attached with external changes, with external narratives of mass media and politics. The view that they have of society is based in a lot of conspiracy, of 'the powers that be'.

What I discovered about disclosure it that in reality there is nothing to disclose. Everything is an illusion. The real truth is inside of you, you are already connected to every living thing in the universe, you don't need an external 'disclosure' to tell you that you are allowed to connect with the greater parts of yourself. This is the dellusion of power, it is to make you think that someone else has the truth, or has what you need or are looking for. There is a saying of the ancient sages that 'the truth is on the tip of your nose'. All this solar flash and disclosure stuff is a massive distraction from us taking the steps to improve our own selves.

From what you are saying It sounds like you have internalised quite a bit of collective trauma along with having gone through quite a bit of your own and now you need to heal it. People like Goode and Wilcock are good showmen but in my opinion they are not very spiritually adept. It sounds like they have already told you everything that you need to know; (1) that we are all one (2) that the path to a better life is through helping others.

My advice to you would be to grow your inner sense of truth and intuition. Whenever you feel confused or in pain about the world, sit and listen to yourself, listen to your body, listen to your breath and come into a state of presence. Remind yourself that you are the centre of the universe, you are the creator. In this state of presence the suffering and confusion seem far off and less real because they are not there with you in the room. You may begin to see how the future by it's very nature is uncertain and that by attatching to any particular future you create expectations, these expectations create feelings inside of you. The art of being balanced and present is to remain non-attached to outcomes, to see all interactions as loving.

I would also recommend listening to yogis such as Sadhguru who have a lot of experience with spiritual practices:
https://www.youtube.com/user/sadhguru