06-14-2022, 01:16 PM
I think what the Buddhist practice Aion mentions and the quote posted by MrWho highlight is the practice of facing your negative emotions and not turning away from them. Usually when we have those sorts of emotions we try to avoid or suppress them as they aren't much fun, but they don't just go away and can instead express themselves chaotically in your life or behaviour.
I can relate to what you say, I used to have a bad habit of arguing with people online. The sort of bad faith arguing you see all over social media where both sides just want to prove the other wrong. In the end these arguments always just lead to more grief, it got to the point when I would get anxious about receiving notifications. I've had to face that feeling of self-righteousness that sometimes leads me to try and "correct" people and ask myself:
If I think I might have something worth sharing then I will approach it that way rather than as a verbal jousting match, without attachment to the idea of bring right. Otherwise, I'll just remain silent and let it go.
The hardest part can be #1. It's very easy to take people for granted, especially online, so it's good to bring to mind the fact that this other person is also a complex being with their own thoughts and feelings. It's also important to take ourselves into account and remember that we have our own biases and drives, which can even be self-destructive at times. Something that can help with this is cultivating compassion for both yourself, as we can sometimes be hard on ourselves when we act in ways we later regret, and all other beings (since we all share the same infinite nature these are really the same thing). A practice I have found helpful in this regard is the Buddhist practice of Metta Bhavana, sometimes called loving-kindness meditation. You can read more about that here https://thebuddhistcentre.com/text/lovin...meditation
I can relate to what you say, I used to have a bad habit of arguing with people online. The sort of bad faith arguing you see all over social media where both sides just want to prove the other wrong. In the end these arguments always just lead to more grief, it got to the point when I would get anxious about receiving notifications. I've had to face that feeling of self-righteousness that sometimes leads me to try and "correct" people and ask myself:
- Am I acknowledging and respecting our shared humanity?
- Can I really be certain that I am right?
- Is there value in me sharing what I do know with this other person and would they be receptive?
If I think I might have something worth sharing then I will approach it that way rather than as a verbal jousting match, without attachment to the idea of bring right. Otherwise, I'll just remain silent and let it go.
The hardest part can be #1. It's very easy to take people for granted, especially online, so it's good to bring to mind the fact that this other person is also a complex being with their own thoughts and feelings. It's also important to take ourselves into account and remember that we have our own biases and drives, which can even be self-destructive at times. Something that can help with this is cultivating compassion for both yourself, as we can sometimes be hard on ourselves when we act in ways we later regret, and all other beings (since we all share the same infinite nature these are really the same thing). A practice I have found helpful in this regard is the Buddhist practice of Metta Bhavana, sometimes called loving-kindness meditation. You can read more about that here https://thebuddhistcentre.com/text/lovin...meditation
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