04-25-2011, 11:57 AM
Monica, you are not seeing this as I see it.
You fear for the "victim", but the victim is in a STS stance as well. We are looking at two people in an STS relationship. Both are vulnerable. Both are in need of love/light. The "victim" is equally responsible for the situation both entities are in.
There is only now. Either we accept now, or we control. You can control the actions of the murderer to stop him, and you place yourself in an STS relationship with him at this point. You can accept him now, and place yourself in an STO relationship with him now. Being murdered is not to be feared if you are actively loving the aggressor. In fact, to fear the aggressor's actions places you in a state of fear, which leads to actions of STS.
You can not love the other at the same time you are controlling the other. To force the other's hand to your will is to love self and not other. The realtionship becomes between you and aggressor and the third party which you call "victim" is not a factor.
The "needs" of each are different. To look on the "victim" with pity is not love. You look them in the eye and say "stand up and walk!".
To draw a line in defense is to stand between aggressor and "victim" and say "I accept your actions, but you and I need to express our relationship now that I am initiating it. Would you attack me as well?".
There is no control now so as to accept later. We are always in the now. You underestimate the power of love, and you see it as secondary to forceful control. I do not see it this way.
As for what I would do...there is no definite answer because all experience is unique. I do know that in my past, the more irate* the individual, the more I am able to relax and draw them to me. As for what anyone should do....there is no "should", there is only what your spirit tells you and your biases and your abilities. All will be okay. I encourage love, in myself as well as others. Controlling any Other is an sts desire. The choice is yours.
.... I remember a time in high school when the ex boyfriend of a girl I was dating came up from behind and bashed my head with a beer bottle and so on and so forth. (he was 6" taller and 80lbs heavier than I). I turned to him and shouted with surity "God bless you!". My adrenaline was flowing, I wasn't going to attack, I dodged and whatnot but I did not flee. He eventually fled the scene himself for fears unknown. ....Later that evening, he attacked a man with his knife and the man retrieved the knife and stabbed him. ....ICU....judicial system....after all that, this guy only wanted to repent for his sins against me, as if I cursed him or something. What he saw in me was somekind of "weird love stuff", and the universe put him in a situation to see it more clearly.
I trust love. I trust the universe. I am not in control. I accept this for what it is. I am a you.
----
alanea*, these are your scars
You fear for the "victim", but the victim is in a STS stance as well. We are looking at two people in an STS relationship. Both are vulnerable. Both are in need of love/light. The "victim" is equally responsible for the situation both entities are in.
There is only now. Either we accept now, or we control. You can control the actions of the murderer to stop him, and you place yourself in an STS relationship with him at this point. You can accept him now, and place yourself in an STO relationship with him now. Being murdered is not to be feared if you are actively loving the aggressor. In fact, to fear the aggressor's actions places you in a state of fear, which leads to actions of STS.
You can not love the other at the same time you are controlling the other. To force the other's hand to your will is to love self and not other. The realtionship becomes between you and aggressor and the third party which you call "victim" is not a factor.
The "needs" of each are different. To look on the "victim" with pity is not love. You look them in the eye and say "stand up and walk!".
To draw a line in defense is to stand between aggressor and "victim" and say "I accept your actions, but you and I need to express our relationship now that I am initiating it. Would you attack me as well?".
There is no control now so as to accept later. We are always in the now. You underestimate the power of love, and you see it as secondary to forceful control. I do not see it this way.
As for what I would do...there is no definite answer because all experience is unique. I do know that in my past, the more irate* the individual, the more I am able to relax and draw them to me. As for what anyone should do....there is no "should", there is only what your spirit tells you and your biases and your abilities. All will be okay. I encourage love, in myself as well as others. Controlling any Other is an sts desire. The choice is yours.
.... I remember a time in high school when the ex boyfriend of a girl I was dating came up from behind and bashed my head with a beer bottle and so on and so forth. (he was 6" taller and 80lbs heavier than I). I turned to him and shouted with surity "God bless you!". My adrenaline was flowing, I wasn't going to attack, I dodged and whatnot but I did not flee. He eventually fled the scene himself for fears unknown. ....Later that evening, he attacked a man with his knife and the man retrieved the knife and stabbed him. ....ICU....judicial system....after all that, this guy only wanted to repent for his sins against me, as if I cursed him or something. What he saw in me was somekind of "weird love stuff", and the universe put him in a situation to see it more clearly.
I trust love. I trust the universe. I am not in control. I accept this for what it is. I am a you.
----
alanea*, these are your scars
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