Shhhh! Needed sleep and silence to wake up...

[Tenet Nosce]

Some people wake up and pop right outta bed. Others hit the snooze...again and again. I think my story is like waking up, hitting the snooze, turning off the alarm, stumbling into the kitchen, blinking in the light, having a snack, turning on the coffee, crawling back under the covers...well, you get the idea.

Thank you, otherself-jesse, for courageously sharing your story. This section struck me in particular:

At some point I realized I had turned over the reins of my decision making. I had a habit, and I followed it daily. Here's where it gets interesting. We know that without sleep, without dream time, the spirit fares badly. When I did dream, nightmares reigned, so I did my best to avoid sleep. Well, that's silly, I know, but I did it. Then I started having a lot of negative thoughts. As one might expect, I was in a bad relationship at the time, with someone else who had a meth habit. That negativity began drawing in more negativity. Now, I didn't truly understand all that was occurring as it happened. This is my review. This is how I've come to see the events that transpired. At the time, I thought I might be going crazy. And yet I couldn't turn away. When the hallucinations began, and the voices never shut up, some part of me would say, "You know this is the drugs, right?" And another part would say, "Yes, but where does it lead? How crazy does it get? Isn't some of this REAL?"

Yes, I believe some of it was real. I've come to the conclusion that the negativity and toxicity altered my vibration to the point of drawing some very nasty negative entities my way. With any drug, certainly with sleep and food deprivation, the mind enters an altered state. The veil thins. You hear and see what others do not. Well, real...hmmm, that's a word for debate in its own right. Whether one sees angels or demons depends on one's thoughts and frequency, IMO.

One night, after no sleep for maybe three days, I had the darkest night of my life. Every person I ever remembered hurting, or deceiving, or to whom I had said something mean, visited my mind. In each one of their voices, I was judged, condemned, taunted, and abandoned. The feeling of unworthiness suffocated me. Our home had many guns, and I considered slipping this life in that way. Another voice threatened me, that of my older sister, who in no uncertain terms made it clear she would whip my a$$ in the next life if I dared to wuss out and leave her in this one. And her voice continued to berate me, to remind me of my responsibilities and promises, until the first light of dawn, when I crawled from the bed, and called her to come to get me.

On 01 April 03, a close friend of mine succumbed to what I perceived to be a negative attack due to experiences quite similar to what you have described. He had been smoking a lot of crystal meth at the time. I documented this experience in this post.

This incident (and two more following) propelled me into a deep journey into the nature of negativity, negative "attack", and the like. Along the way, I actually "dismissed" my spirit guides/angels as I perceived them to be leading me into these type of negative experiences.

I am just now coming to put this all together- to untie the knot with forgiveness- and to invite my invisible support system into my life.

Thanks again for your insights and the Q'uote. Please do share any further insights you come to in this matter.

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Otherself-Jesse - I'm fairly new here and just read your story. Thank you for sharing so much of yourself with us. Zeva said it! YOU ARE SHINING!
Love and light!

Thank YOU for drawing my attention to this thread!