The mysterious nature of time

[AnthroHeart]

Confused, can you find any material on intensifying desires? That's what I was doing. When I had something that would arouse me (seems sexuality was my strongest desire), I would mentally let the story build until it was too much for me, and then I'd back off. Then I'd build it more, then back off. That's how I got rid of desires that I have so far.

Now the things that used to really set me off, even those fetishes I had, produce pretty much no response, even when looking at artworks of them. If there is a particularly stubborn desire, I'll even use masturbation to build the sexual energy, but I don't reach orgasm as I don't want to cut off the flow. I want to build the intensity of the sexual energy as much as possible, and then integrate it into myself. Believe me, this is a very difficult way to tackle desires. The sexual energy has my legs shaking quite dramatically.

I had to be honest with myself in this process. There is a degree of mental fortitude to tackle one's desires in a direct manner without giving into them. I also did the same with fears, intensifying them.