01-26-2012, 03:02 PM
I seek opinions on the following:
1: I use weed to cope with GAD and PTSD. I have used it near non-stop for 4 months, I have been off of it 2-4 times for 1 week or more the longest being a few weeks. I am somewhat apprehensive that I might be developing a addiction. After a copious amount last week I decided to stop for a while and went around a week without, but due to the stress of living surrounded by mostly brainwashed and potentially quite dangerous people I decided to resume smoking as it seems to lift my vibration so that I am able to avoid the worst problems. I have also connected better with my friends and relatives due to smoking and no one has had a serious argument with me about it, a few have joked about me being addicted but jokes aside everyone seems to, in general, enjoy my company more. I am also financially more stable now. Now, I would normally not consider quitting now as the effects on both my health and the health of those near to me seems to be improving and everyone seems happier as well. My diagnosis is that i'm less of a douche when high and should continue it until I can find a quiet place all of my own in which to relax without weed for several months. Opinions?
2. I have a desire to resume writing, yet I am unable to convince myself that it is a productive use of my time. I worry about it being "productive" even though it is something I simply wish to do.
3. I am aware of my transition from what might be coined 3d to what might, also, be coined 5th D and the open acceptance that all entities display to me when I'm "high" enough spiritually is extremely disconcerting. When I see someone and they see that I hurt or that they even talk with me it feels uncomfortable and in many ways, painful. I do not enjoy the sensation of it being painful to me but I have for so long believed that many do not see the spirit world as I do, now that I see that they not only see the world, now that i have dropped my masks they see me as well. The full acceptance and viewing of my soul/astral self feels uncomfortable as I have many things i would rather not show to others. Yet, i still have a desire to show them.
4. I believe that the best way to create a world that is best for everyone is to tell stories or create art. It is the only verifiable method of influencing people and painting a nice story. Theoretically I could simply take something like DMT or acid and just leave this body behind and merge with the god-self, but that to me, seems like an illusion. As all actions must be grounded on all levels where such an action might have an affect. And as long as merging with the god self would result in death of the physical self, then such a merging would be counter-productive and I should, instead, focus on what this physical self deems best for its own survival regardless of how smart it might be. Therefore, i believe that creating computer games and telling fictional stories is one of the best ways to really influence people. That and politics and i believe that politics is of lesser ability to influence people unless taken to the extreme such as US-Pres.
Opinions are much appreciated.
1: I use weed to cope with GAD and PTSD. I have used it near non-stop for 4 months, I have been off of it 2-4 times for 1 week or more the longest being a few weeks. I am somewhat apprehensive that I might be developing a addiction. After a copious amount last week I decided to stop for a while and went around a week without, but due to the stress of living surrounded by mostly brainwashed and potentially quite dangerous people I decided to resume smoking as it seems to lift my vibration so that I am able to avoid the worst problems. I have also connected better with my friends and relatives due to smoking and no one has had a serious argument with me about it, a few have joked about me being addicted but jokes aside everyone seems to, in general, enjoy my company more. I am also financially more stable now. Now, I would normally not consider quitting now as the effects on both my health and the health of those near to me seems to be improving and everyone seems happier as well. My diagnosis is that i'm less of a douche when high and should continue it until I can find a quiet place all of my own in which to relax without weed for several months. Opinions?
2. I have a desire to resume writing, yet I am unable to convince myself that it is a productive use of my time. I worry about it being "productive" even though it is something I simply wish to do.
3. I am aware of my transition from what might be coined 3d to what might, also, be coined 5th D and the open acceptance that all entities display to me when I'm "high" enough spiritually is extremely disconcerting. When I see someone and they see that I hurt or that they even talk with me it feels uncomfortable and in many ways, painful. I do not enjoy the sensation of it being painful to me but I have for so long believed that many do not see the spirit world as I do, now that I see that they not only see the world, now that i have dropped my masks they see me as well. The full acceptance and viewing of my soul/astral self feels uncomfortable as I have many things i would rather not show to others. Yet, i still have a desire to show them.
4. I believe that the best way to create a world that is best for everyone is to tell stories or create art. It is the only verifiable method of influencing people and painting a nice story. Theoretically I could simply take something like DMT or acid and just leave this body behind and merge with the god-self, but that to me, seems like an illusion. As all actions must be grounded on all levels where such an action might have an affect. And as long as merging with the god self would result in death of the physical self, then such a merging would be counter-productive and I should, instead, focus on what this physical self deems best for its own survival regardless of how smart it might be. Therefore, i believe that creating computer games and telling fictional stories is one of the best ways to really influence people. That and politics and i believe that politics is of lesser ability to influence people unless taken to the extreme such as US-Pres.
Opinions are much appreciated.