Greetings from the Dark

[Zaxon]

Lulu,

I accepted the darkness in myself many years ago. I have always been conscious of the fact that I identify with shadows. I lured the creature to my dreams with a hunter's eye toward conquest. I intentionally depolarized and waffled between polarities, and called outward to any who would respond. The shadow creature answered my call, as I had hoped, sensing my energy was unstable and weak. However, its threat and attempt to dominate me had the effect of pushing me more deeply into negative polarity than I had ever been. I felt myself become electric power and pure will, and consumed him with hunger and wicked glee. As I consumed the creature I myself became what might be described as an etheric dragon. Consuming the creature was the act of a victor consuming the residual bodily energies of a foe.

I have experienced both polarities and find my preference is negativity. All beings are capable of either polarity, however, I believe most are natively attuned to one or the other. I can experience the positive energies, but have no desire to walk the positive path. My native distortions call towards negativity and always have. Either path may lead to the joy one feels upon attaining intelligent energy. Desires determine how the energy is used and how one is to be of service. I have no desires to aid others, so I tend towards passivity when I attempt the STO orientation, even though I can experience the creation with immense empathy and comprehend other selves as unity. The passivity makes it difficult to summon the desire even to move. However, in negative polarity I am able to dynamically experience intelligent energy, as there is no limit to my desire for self-aggrandizement.

-Zaxon