03-27-2012, 11:59 PM
(This post was last modified: 03-28-2012, 12:05 AM by Tenet Nosce.)
Thanks for the thoughts, everyone!
Ruth- Your post got me thinking again about the other thread we were chatting in last night, and reminded me that now might be a good time to take my own advice!
Shin'Ar- Without putting too much energy on the details, it is somebody who I was close friends with for about 7 years. Long story short, I evicted him out of my house after he had a psychotic breakdown induced by crystal meth and refused to get help. Somehow, he apparently still styles himself as the "victim" in all this. There is much more to the story, but I am growing really tired of thinking about it.
abridgetoofar- It's not out of the question, but I question how effective it would be, practically or spiritually. I don't know that he has actually done anything illegal...
Something else to add here... well maybe there actually is something to learn yet from this catalyst. The thing is that as far back as I can remember I have a hard time feeling joy. For whatever reason I am not yet fully aware, I feel like I were to allow myself to feel completely joyful there would be some type of repercussions, or that it would trigger some sort of horrible event in my life.
I've been aware of this for quite some time, but still haven't quite come upon the solution. Though I think I may be starting to see it because the past couple of days I was actually starting to open up to joy. Last night in particular was a good night. So today I am feeling pretty good, enjoying life.
And here come the emails. Well then- maybe this is a catalyst to demonstrate that feeling joy is part of a choice. A choice which exists in every place at every moment as represented by two counter-rotating spirals.
Here I sit. With a million great reasons to feel joyful, and one reason to feel fearful and angry. To which do I turn my focus and awareness?
Ruth- Your post got me thinking again about the other thread we were chatting in last night, and reminded me that now might be a good time to take my own advice!
Shin'Ar- Without putting too much energy on the details, it is somebody who I was close friends with for about 7 years. Long story short, I evicted him out of my house after he had a psychotic breakdown induced by crystal meth and refused to get help. Somehow, he apparently still styles himself as the "victim" in all this. There is much more to the story, but I am growing really tired of thinking about it.
abridgetoofar- It's not out of the question, but I question how effective it would be, practically or spiritually. I don't know that he has actually done anything illegal...
Something else to add here... well maybe there actually is something to learn yet from this catalyst. The thing is that as far back as I can remember I have a hard time feeling joy. For whatever reason I am not yet fully aware, I feel like I were to allow myself to feel completely joyful there would be some type of repercussions, or that it would trigger some sort of horrible event in my life.
I've been aware of this for quite some time, but still haven't quite come upon the solution. Though I think I may be starting to see it because the past couple of days I was actually starting to open up to joy. Last night in particular was a good night. So today I am feeling pretty good, enjoying life.
And here come the emails. Well then- maybe this is a catalyst to demonstrate that feeling joy is part of a choice. A choice which exists in every place at every moment as represented by two counter-rotating spirals.
Here I sit. With a million great reasons to feel joyful, and one reason to feel fearful and angry. To which do I turn my focus and awareness?
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