Relationship between one's greatest fear and spiritual progression

[Brittany]

I'm not even going to pretend to know what the "passing grade" for harvest exactly entails. I tend to not see the harvest as having a standard measure which everyone is held up to- an arbitrary equation of behaviors that must be added just so to produce the "correct" result. It seems obvious that graduating into 4th involves careful consideration of the heart chakra- the decision to either commit to opening it as much as possible or the decision to work toward shutting it off completely. This is the core decision, but as to what particular degrees of development are required for acceptable progress to be registered...I personally think that decision is made on an individual basis. It is the entity themselves who decides if the learning has been sufficient enough to enter the next grade. All my personal opinion, of course.

I do, however, think that facing your greatest fear head on is a very important part of progressing as a soul as a whole, regardless of harvests and densities and all that. To face one's fear is to gain freedom from that fear, and when one is truly free the potential for true, unlimited joy becomes active. This is your soul's joy, and attempting to rush it and do a "patch fix" just because of a feeling of an inevitable cutoff date fast approaching...this, in my opinion, is selling yourself short. It's like running through a landmine to get to the grocery store. Sure, you hit that sale they were having on cake mix, but now you're missing a leg. Was the exchange worth it?

I've gone through this a LOT myself...the "ohgodohgodohgod...I don't have enough time! Harvest is right here and I'm not nearly good enough yet! I could be so much better if I just had more time...now I'm not going to make it!" These thoughts have literally kept me up at night, and driven me into many a depression. Then I realized that all that time I spent moping about over my own inadequacies could have been used to serve others and take part in the reason I came here to begin with: sending much-needed love to this planet. I don't have to be perfectly balanced to radiate love- I can do that as I am, even with all my flaws. Sure, I work to better myself, balance myself and increase my understanding a little each day. Progressing to the next level of existence is very high on my wish list. But, even on my bad days, when it feels like no progress was made or I'm even sliding backwards, I can still offer that gift of love to those who need all they can get.

These thoughts helped to relieve some of the pressure I was feeling, and since releasing a lot of those fears my development has actually skyrocketed, because I have freed myself from a circular thought pattern. As long as you're continually worrying about passing or failing, you're missing the true potential of each moment of your existence- the power you have right now.

So I suppose, in the end, my answer would be a little of both. If it feels like there is an issue that needs to be worked on, work on it without attaching that progress to deadlines and future outcomes. Let your progress come with each moment, savoring each step upward instead of gazing longingly at the top of the stairs. Enjoy who you are NOW and use the potential you find within this moment, for that is all you truly have. Then you can be truly satisfied when you notice positive change in your life. At the same time, know what your core values are- what is most important to you in your life, and seek to meet those values unrelentingly in the face of all challenge and opposition. If your highest ideal is Love, then ever seek to give Love and to be Love, regardless of what specific lessons you are working on. If you realize you have gone a moment without love, let that realization double the output of the next moment. When you know what truly matters most to you, then all other desires will be in congruency with the primary desire and you will be able to pursue these desires simultaneously. You really can have your cake and eat it, too.

Again, all my opinion. You're a great guy, Xise, and I can't imagine you not having graduated already. I think a great many seekers will be surprised at how much progress they've made- how worthy they actually are- once the curtain is lifted.