what did you learn today?

[AnthroHeart]

That I still don't know if I am harvestable.
And I sometimes worry when I shouldn't about that.

[BlatzAdict]

Today I learned it takes a s*** ton of balance to achieve balance.

I know that sounds so retarded. I have several examples

There is this person at work I can't stop crushing on, but it's only physical and none of this attraction is mental. Deep inside I know it is an illusion, and I wonder if I would be happier with something more practical for sexual gratification instead of a human person.

she sat across from me and got moved, which is fine i don't have to focus on it i suppose. I run into the trouble of thinking that maybe no one wants to be around me, or no one finds me suitable due to the rejection of this one person.

Yesterday when she did sit across from me all i could think was that i was getting angry at myself for liking someone who is like everyone else. The physical is all too real, but what is underneath speaks so much more loudly.

So loud that it's almost unbearable.
I'll try to explain this further, I sat down and caught her sitting across from me, the next thing is a rushed smile, the warmth in her face did not come through in the smile, it was like seeing a plastic bag that had been stretched too many times to do the same thing over and over again.

It was like this face http://alltheragefaces.com/img/faces/lar...face-l.png

Also when I kiss someone, now it's just more of this emptyness, something that does not exist. A connection, a depth of feeling.
Kissing someone is almost like pressing your face to a balloon, there is pressure indicating that something is blocking your physicality, but there is nothing inside that balloon.


I was trying to talk with a friend from this forum, and i didn't want them to tell me anything about growing, and then I did the same thing as she was describing to me a physical death of her friend but also knowing that he was still around in spirit.

. I'm at the point where I know what my lesson is and I can see duality for what it is, but I suppose I'm still having problems assimilating and finishing the lesson.

The welling in my body was can't she know that it's just the way it needs to be. I kept telling myself as I was talking to my friend, oh god no, this catalyst she's going through, I'm going to go through it, I can feel it coming on, I'm going to have to catalyze lonliness again.

I keep trying to tell myself the same when I go through thoughts of lonliness or what not or feelings of disconnectedness

I think the hardest part in assimilating all of it is that the feelings of lack or abundance start with me, and the material world follows suit as a result and not the other way around..

So finding an excuse to feel and be positive and to have love in my heart is actually a lot harder than it seems. When it seems so real that no one is there helping me, other than me. At the same time are my thoughts even my own.

Inspiration and pretty much anything else are thoughts from other entities. fear and love, free will, we are given a choice to choose between love the prime directive, and fear the illusion of no prime directive.

how come there is no third door?

I'm also wanting to get the eff off of earth because if progress is this slow getting into 4D, well I'm sick of waiting. I am sick of waiting for any sort of changes, anything that I want must be worked towards to achieve to get in the now, and not later, not yesterday

[AnthroHeart]

Blatz, I too am little tired of waiting.
And for me, I don't feel I'll ever find the love that I seek,
because it just isn't real for me.
Maybe in the next life. Who knows?
Even without finding intimate love, I can still be positive and loving.
I like reading what you write.

[xise]

Today I further learned that I need to learn patience - in essence being at peace with the pace of my spiritual evolution. Else self-judgement brings me further down.

[Cyan]

I learned that I can either accept that I get the best mate that I possibly can, or i wont.

[AnthroHeart]

To approach Creator by leaning ever so slightly into the Light, rather than forcefully trying to blaze a trail. Easier to stay grounded and balanced that way.

Cyan, as for mate myself, I'm holding out for the next life. My preferred mate doesn't exist here.

Like this song speaks to, I'm holding out for a hero.

[Ruth]

That my spider plant has spider mites.

[Confused]

That my spider plant has spider mites.

ROFL!

[reeay]

That my spider plant has spider mites.

...that you detected with your 'spidey sense' lol

[BrownEye]

That free will and choice remain within boundaries. Those boundaries allow us to experience joy or frustration within the very same dualistic choices.

[Cyan]

That I do indeed have near unlimited choices while the limits are within the realm of what I wish to remain my sense of self.

[Plenum]

today I learnt that classical music is still in my veins. I am rediscovering so many great pieces and performances via youtube. Ever since they lifted their 10min upload limit, all sorts of wonderful pieces (documentaries, concerts) have been able to be put online.

these biases, and long standing ones from earlier in life, these are in place for a particular reason. Your incarnational plan does not decide on a life that includes all things (such a life would not be possible) but offers experiences in a particular area or map. We explore it, know it well, and learn the lessons from it. These biases are not faults or blindspots; they are directional pointers to the most fruitful areas to explore for ourselves.

and so like the Hierophant; know thyself!

[Spaced]

I've been getting a lot of insight into one of my guides this week. It might sound strange, but I think the goddess Persephone is watching over me, or at least she represents some aspect of my psyche.

[Jeremy]

I'm coming more and more to the realization that I truly do not know anything. When I seem to have it all figured out, mystery likes to slap me in the face to remind me that my work is nowhere near complete and to think otherwise is setting ones self up for disaster. The type of disaster that I'm now experiencing. But the faith that everything will be ok has enabled me to push through this difficult catalyst. At least partially.

[GentleReckoning]

I've been getting a lot of insight into one of my guides this week. It might sound strange, but I think the goddess Persephone is watching over me, or at least she represents some aspect of my psyche.

It's kind of annoying that they don't reveal their identity to us. It's probably due to a combination of free will, confusion, and how our ego would react.

While, I understand that, I can't help but keep wondering.

[Ruth]

I was reminded today that it is not yet time for us to move back to Oklahoma/Texas area. We have been talking about it, and I do long to be back near my kids, grandkid and long time friends. But I am allergic to the area! And today the wind turned to come from the SW again, and I'm feeling it. So, I guess I'll go shovel snow and be grateful that I'm so happy here, too.

Xradfl - I know exactly what you mean! I learned a long time ago to quit trying to figure it all out and just try to enjoy each moment as it comes, while paying attention to signs and signals that you need to make a change. (as I mentioned above).

Much love to each of you!

[Spaced]

I've been getting a lot of insight into one of my guides this week. It might sound strange, but I think the goddess Persephone is watching over me, or at least she represents some aspect of my psyche.

It's kind of annoying that they don't reveal their identity to us. It's probably due to a combination of free will, confusion, and how our ego would react.

While, I understand that, I can't help but keep wondering.

She revealed herself to me in a way. I had a dream where I saw her, a beautiful maiden whose grace was balanced by the unbelievable sadness I saw in her eyes. I usually avoid asking for names, but the name Persephone kept coming to me. Also for the past few weeks I have had a weird urge to buy pomegranate flavoured and scented things lol.

[Lycen]

Well I can not say I thought of this today, but recently!

That having others share their thoughts with or away of meine. It becomes a picture of not ones thoughts but many and I find my self glad for it. Because I know that if I err or am not able to bring the truth of my feelings out, someone els will do it! The same way I can for others. Thus we can paint a much clearer canvas together, then "separate".
We all have moments of strength and weakness, but together, we bring balance to each other when that happens .)

This makes me appreciate what "others" say, when I find myself lost to "lower" feelings.

[GentleReckoning]

I've been getting a lot of insight into one of my guides this week. It might sound strange, but I think the goddess Persephone is watching over me, or at least she represents some aspect of my psyche.

It's kind of annoying that they don't reveal their identity to us. It's probably due to a combination of free will, confusion, and how our ego would react.

While, I understand that, I can't help but keep wondering.

She revealed herself to me in a way. I had a dream where I saw her, a beautiful maiden whose grace was balanced by the unbelievable sadness I saw in her eyes. I usually avoid asking for names, but the name Persephone kept coming to me. Also for the past few weeks I have had a weird urge to buy pomegranate flavoured and scented things lol.

I got to learn the identity of my soulgroup right before leaving Thailand. It makes sense, as I originally went to Thailand looking for a soulmate. I still don't know who my teacher is though.

[Ankh]

I've been getting a lot of insight into one of my guides this week. It might sound strange, but I think the goddess Persephone is watching over me, or at least she represents some aspect of my psyche.

It's kind of annoying that they don't reveal their identity to us. It's probably due to a combination of free will, confusion, and how our ego would react.

While, I understand that, I can't help but keep wondering.

She revealed herself to me in a way. I had a dream where I saw her, a beautiful maiden whose grace was balanced by the unbelievable sadness I saw in her eyes. I usually avoid asking for names, but the name Persephone kept coming to me. Also for the past few weeks I have had a weird urge to buy pomegranate flavoured and scented things lol.

Could it be an aspect of you though, Spaced? Persephone was abducted against her will, and she got extremely sad when that happened. Could this "Persephone" be an aspect of yourself, which your Higher Self is trying to show you in this way, that there is an aspect of you which is very sad and which feels that it has been "abducted" in some way, away from home?

[Spaced]

I've been getting a lot of insight into one of my guides this week. It might sound strange, but I think the goddess Persephone is watching over me, or at least she represents some aspect of my psyche.

It's kind of annoying that they don't reveal their identity to us. It's probably due to a combination of free will, confusion, and how our ego would react.

While, I understand that, I can't help but keep wondering.

She revealed herself to me in a way. I had a dream where I saw her, a beautiful maiden whose grace was balanced by the unbelievable sadness I saw in her eyes. I usually avoid asking for names, but the name Persephone kept coming to me. Also for the past few weeks I have had a weird urge to buy pomegranate flavoured and scented things lol.

Could it be an aspect of you though, Spaced? Persephone was abducted against her will, and she got extremely sad when that happened. Could this "Persephone" be an aspect of yourself, which your Higher Self is trying to show you in this way, that there is an aspect of you which is very sad and which feels that it has been "abducted" in some way, away from home?

Yeah, I'm starting to think that it is an aspect of my personality that was shown to me to bring it into focus.

I found this site on google and I find I resonate with a lot of the information http://goddess-power.com/persephone.htm

What's interesting about Persephone is that she goes through a progression: The Kore (the vulnerable maiden), Persephone the mature woman who is Queen of and guide to the Underworld, and the Crone, wise but emotionally detached.

[AnthroHeart]

I still don't know who my teacher is though.

I am no longer looking for a teacher. When I asked for one, I got one or more that I don't remember ever meeting but had some evidence of, and got a little more than I expected. But it was all on me, as I kept asking for more experience, to my very breaking point. My only restriction I placed on my experiencing was "I did not come to die or to be tortured." Both of these were kept. I wasn't ever given more than I could handle.

[GentleReckoning]

I still don't know who my teacher is though.

I am no longer looking for a teacher. When I asked for one, I got one or more that I don't remember ever meeting but had some evidence of, and got a little more than I could handle. But it was all on me, as I kept asking for more experience, to my very breaking point. My only restriction I placed on my experiencing was "I did not come to die or to be tortured." Both of these were kept. I wasn't ever given more than I could handle.

I suspect that my teacher is the same entity that originally sparked my seeking during last summer. It was the origin of my 'spiritual awakening'.

[AnthroHeart]

I keep seeing beings moving out of the corner of my eyes. When I look, they're gone. Seems to happen several times a day. Doesn't frighten me. Just curious.

[native]

[Marc]

Even though I am a light, people can still close their eyes to my brilliance, but I may still radiate to where their body feels my rays of light even though their eyes are closed.

[Spaced]

I found out that if I try to focus my energy into my solar plexus in the morning random strangers will start conversations with me throughout the day.

[GentleReckoning]

I learned that I'll probably have to get around to dealing with every single thing that I've been avoiding in life since my balls dropped... all in the span of the next 3 or 4 months.

[reeay]

I have a very difficult time spelling these words when I use them in the same sentence: presentation, precipitant, predisposition, and perpetuant.

[Cyan]

That its time to take a 2 week break or a 5 month break, depending on which way I like my life, and also, that the last episode of house season 8 was awesome.