Been through hell.

[Phoenix]

I've been through some difficult experiences recently. Very emotionally charged etc. There doesn't seem to be any end in sight if things go wrong. You end up in a bad job or something terrible, permanently separated from people or things important for your life purpose etc. A choice someone tried to force me into today I'm quite sure would have resulted in my death. It has for me been relentless. I wonder if anyone else has had similar experiences as of late?

[GentleReckoning]

Yes.

When in hell, the best advice I can give you is to simply burn. Eventually you stop burning and hell looks a little different. That is if you are in hell along with awareness and some other admirable attributes. Some people seem to perpetually burn in hell.

[AnthroHeart]

At work I volunteered someone else to take on some work that I didn't want to do. My boss caught me doing that and assigned me the work instead. Also I used to take long lunches, but that's done now. Caught taking a long lunch. I'm not doing too well at work. Work is getting harder.

My mom gets onto me about not taking care of the dogs properly. I let their water run out and forget to check it till the next day. So they're without water through the night.

Also feeling some intense anxiety about life. My friends home was burgularized, and I feel bad for him.

[Plenum]

A choice someone tried to force me into today I'm quite sure would have resulted in my death.

that sounds rough. Can you elaborate a bit more?

[Phoenix]

A choice someone tried to force me into today I'm quite sure would have resulted in my death.

that sounds rough. Can you elaborate a bit more?

Basically. I have gone through a long lesson of having to learn the lesson about actually wanting to be a loving being and not shutting it down. When I decided not to be a loving being, my energy shut down, that's what I meant by death. I realise this seems very over- exaggerated. I think I have a bit of a narcissistic streak.

Really the problem has been that I have been very anxious. And this I have solved by wearing a crucifix as I summarised in the thread on ouiji boards. It is genuinely gone now. I can feel the entities wanting to get back in but they cannot.

[Steppingfeet]

Basically. I have gone through a long lesson of having to learn the lesson about actually wanting to be a loving being and not shutting it down. When I decided not to be a loving being, my energy shut down, that's what I meant by death. I realise this seems very over- exaggerated. I think I have a bit of a narcissistic streak.

Really the problem has been that I have been very anxious. And this I have solved by wearing a crucifix as I summarised in the thread on ouiji boards. It is genuinely gone now. I can feel the entities wanting to get back in but they cannot.

Those are hard knocks, Phoenix. Life seems to tumble and jostle us around until we more and more turn to faith as our response, and love as our way. Never an easy road, though.

Sending love.

[Phoenix]

Thanks for the love. .

[Guardian]

The further you fall the higher you fly. Remember, the higher self doesn't allow you to experience anything you can't handle. Be strong and meditate through the suffering until you reach clarity. 10 day Vipassana meditation is the best thing you could do for yourself when going through hell. Www.dhamma.org

[BrownEye]

Often it feels as if we go through hell when we are in fact resisting our guides and higher self. Some people resist enough to hurt themselves ending up in the hospital. The moment they give up and relax they find that things drastically improve.

Basically we can try so hard to do something that feels as if we have to try harder and harder, when it is simply not part of the program. Think of it as "they have something better in mind" for you.

[Phoenix]

Often it feels as if we go through hell when we are in fact resisting our guides and higher self. Some people resist enough to hurt themselves ending up in the hospital. The moment they give up and relax they find that things drastically improve.

Basically we can try so hard to do something that feels as if we have to try harder and harder, when it is simply not part of the program. Think of it as "they have something better in mind" for you.

I hope that's what it is!

I don't think that is what it is though. I've been wearing this crucifix around my neck but haven't internalised the lesson. I literally had the opportunity for things to go right and got a lot of good signs. But then under complex thoughts I made a decision that didn't forgive, and now I've been thrown to the gutter.

That is the story I've told myself. Perhaps it is the wrong one. There are opportunities to be positive though, all is not lost.

[Unbound]

My friend, remember you are never alone and may always call on those who would assist you with love when you find you are pressed by the darkness of unconsciousness.

[BrownEye]

and now I've been thrown to the gutter.

No, they only wait for you to start listening.

[Phoenix]

Post deleted.

[AnthroHeart]

That was a bit of an assumption about the gutter. I'm taking a new approach now. That possibly all that I was thinking was not correct and that I need counselling.

I hope, as you say 'they have something better in mind.'

Who's they?

[Phoenix]

Forces guiding my life. But I would suppose that would mean my inner self, on some level what I want.

[AnthroHeart]

I would never have thought my life was guided by forces. But I guess I am influenced more than I care to admit.

By forces do you mean other people, or spirit guides and the like?

[Phoenix]

This whole thing has been what I call karma.

I have just written to the person involved forgiving them. Twice before, once with this person and once with another. I have forgiven and then not been able to carry it through with my actions. Then the bad feelings/ situations return and these are awful. I don't know what this 'forgiving being' will be guided to do with his actions but I know that if I don't carry out whatever it is I will depolarise.

So I am scared and stuck.

Well, to the best of my knowledge I did carry out what I was guided to do, It may be over now or it may not.

[sunnysideup]

18.12 Questioner: You stated yesterday that forgiveness is the eradicator of karma. I am assuming that balanced forgiveness for the full eradication of karma would require forgiveness not only of other-selves but forgiveness of self. Am I correct?
Ra: I am Ra. You are correct. We will briefly expand upon this understanding in order to clarify.
Forgiveness of other-self is forgiveness of self. An understanding of this insists upon full forgiveness upon the conscious level of self and other-self, for they are one. A full forgiveness is thus impossible without the inclusion of self.

Maybe this quote can offer you some answers, Phoenix.

[Adonai One]

I was out of school, temporarily believed the world had nothing to the offer me. Accepted the lack of certainty, did things anyways without great expectation; Learned to enjoy the fear of not knowing what's coming. What's for certain, there is always something coming.

Learn to embrace whatever comes and it all feels good.

[Phoenix]

Post deleted.

[Phoenix]

I want to go back to this post, even though it is perhaps a little self centered.

I so regularly feel pretty awful because of purely energetic concerns. I feel like my entire energy field will open or close based on one decision. My heart chakra has just opened a bit because of one, but it has all become difficult.

Right now my third eye is switched on as well. The whole universe seems to open up again, but not completely. So confusing. I just hope that these experiences which are like a gun being put to my back actually lead into good places. Rather than bad ones.

[xise]

Why do you feel it necessary to delete your posts?

What are the origins of your fears?

[Phoenix]

I delete them so that I know that what I have said is the truth and that times when I have been greeted and spouted nonsense from my amazing brain, there is no energetic connection between me and the words that could have a negative effect on others.

[AnthroHeart]

I deleted some of my old posts that I thought I was polarizing negatively, and didn't want to have a negative effect on anyone.

[MDL5]

yea well no matter how bad in hell we are today this current world is s*** with evil people and terrible things....and what i do is no matter how bad the situation im in well i jus look around n ill see a flower on a tree or sumthing and then i tell myself no matter how bad this world seems there is always goodness around us we jus have to notice them and focus on them not the bad and feel good our delfs because of them and we can add to the good parts of the world rather than being apart of the bad parts

[AnthroHeart]

yea well no matter how bad in hell we are today this current world is s*** with evil people and terrible things....and what i do is no matter how bad the situation im in well i jus look around n ill see a flower on a tree or sumthing and then i tell myself no matter how bad this world seems there is always goodness around us we jus have to notice them and focus on them not the bad and feel good our delfs because of them and we can add to the good parts of the world rather than being apart of the bad parts

Good point. I try to make the world a better place by starting within, through meditation. I try to change the negative energy into positive, with the help of my guides and mother Earth.

I've been through hell too, but it makes me a stronger man. Even though I'm usually afraid of the energy at stores and such.