I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. Today the Q’uo quote comes from July 12, 1992:
The question this afternoon deals with the concept of change and transformation, and the confusion, the anger, the frustration that comes when we don’t feel that we’re changing in the way that we wish to change. Most students of their own evolution look at their lives, and, at some time, attempt to match the life with the ideals that they hold, and feel that there are certain things that they can do. But most of us look at our attempts to change and feel that we are inadequate in our change, and that we are perhaps not even moving in the right direction. And as we begin to change and have this confusion and anger, we become further befuddled when we don’t move as we wish. It seems to be a self-perpetuating cycle, and we’re wondering if there’s a way that we can make the process of change one more easily accomplished; or is there some necessity for change, in order for it to be seated in our being, to become a tumultuous sort of experience? Are we supposed to be in turmoil? Is there some benefit that we can gain from being in turmoil? Is there some way to deal with the turmoil that is erroneous? Can we communicate with our higher selves through dreams? Can we do exercises? Can we watch our diet? Can we meditate more? What can we do that will make our perception of our change more balanced and harmonious? How can we accomplish change in the most efficient manner as seekers of truth?
(Carla channeling)
We are those of Q’uo. Greetings and blessings to each in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We wish you the peace of heart and mind that seekers have, yet often know not that they have, and would offer our thoughts in reaction to your query upon the ways of dealing with confusion when the changes in life feel as though they were coming too quickly to understand or guide. As we offer our thoughts, we remind each that our opinions are fallible, and, if any thought disturbs any of you or feels misplaced, simply to omit it from your memory, as we would not offer even more confusion of an unhelpful kind.
We imply that change can be helpful. Confusion can be helpful, and do so on purpose. There is a difference between discomfort and injury. The confusion of incarnate life in general is massive, and was meant to be so in order to challenge and successfully baffle the intellectual mind, which thinks in black and white, yes and no. The point of this baffling effect is to coax the seeker into opening the heart to the processes of thinking, evaluating, and decision-making. Those with unawakened hearts may reason perfectly, yet come to inappropriate or inefficient decisions and conclusions relative to their own deeper desires. The spiritual journey is many things, but is not linear or logical.
Earlier this day, this instrument was thinking of a story within its holy work. It is an apt tale to share at this time. It concerns a traveler who was robbed, beaten, and left upon the road. He was passed by a very well-placed gentleman who had an appointment. The man left the traveler on the road, as did another wealthy man. But there was a stranger who found the man, and although he was not from this particular region, the stranger took up the robbed and beaten man, carried him to a place of safety and succor, and made sure the beaten traveler had what he needed to recover.
In the context of the Holy Bible’s story, this was an answer to a question concerning who one’s neighbor is. The answer indicated that all were neighbors, not simply those clustered geographically around one. In the context of the query concerning confusion in a time of change, the story may be seen to be an inward representation of a frequent circumstance which occurs when the seeker attempts to monitor, review, analyze, and interrupt the process of change in order to make it more like the picture the seeker has in the mind.
When a seeker becomes an actor not only of desire, but of grasping the life as it is being lived, and attempting to help the process of change along, the seeker is standing athwart what may loosely be called “desire-driven destiny.” The resulting cross tides of confusion are a mechanically created artifact of this stance. Yet, each seeker wishes to so live the life and so cleanly make each choice that it is in charge of the life experience and gives it up to the infinite One as a beautiful gift.
The group question for this session was: What can we do that will make our perception of our change more balanced and harmonious? How can we accomplish change in the most efficient manner as seekers of truth? Q’uo began by saying that change and confusion can be helpful because they are part of opening one’s heart to the process of thinking and making choices. Then Q’uo used the story of the Good Samaritan from the Bible to illustrate that we can’t intellectually evaluate who our neighbors are, since we are all one, and we can’t evaluate that which occurs when we attempt to analyze the process of change and how it may occur outside the bounds of what we see as change. Then Q’uo said that when we try to manipulate the changes occurring in our lives, we are interfering with our destiny which causes confusion, and the best course to follow would be to make the choice to give up the changing life experience to the infinite One as a beautiful gift. On March 19, 1989, Hatonn spoke of using change as a means to turn to the mysterious face of the Eternal One:
It is well that the change takes place slowly enough that one’s mate may deal with it as well as one’s self. The process of change is sometimes painful, and we urge each to be extremely courageous and pick oneself up after each and every self-perceived failure to turn one’s face again to the mysterious face of the Eternal One.
Of course, seekers wish to help along the process of transformation. But if the seeker can pull the point of view back far enough to gaze upon the conscious self living through the confusion of change, which has been put in motion because of purified desire, this seeker may see that once the desire is honed and tempered then there comes the time of faithful patience. The intellectual mind may rush ahead and seem to predict accurately outcomes which are not actual outcomes, thus creating confusion on top of the necessary initial confusion which accompanies any change.
How much better to respect the work in consciousness which has been done, and then to see the self as the first neighbor, the nearest one to the observing portion of the self. The conscious seeker moving through the frustration, pain, and anger of not yet understood changes is a weary, broken, tired and needy traveler. Yet, there is a portion of the self which may remember to forget the rush towards the next appointment, to let go of the control of happenstance, because there is a neighbor, a self—which happens to be the self, rather than an other—which needs aid and comfort in his travail.
The seeker is so eager to go through the process of transformation, yet it is a long, subtle process. The implications of any one decision seem on the surface limited, but when one is transforming the being the seemingly limited ripples of effect give way to a much more complex field of interwoven options or varieties of tone and color in the, may we call it, “sub-programs” within the mind which are in fact effected by seemingly simple changes in the way of being.
To change an action is relatively simple in its effect upon the essential core meta-program of beingness. It often does not touch any deep programming to change a behavior. But you are asking about changing a beingness, changing the way of perceiving and experiencing one’s own essence and this is endlessly subtle work.
You can, and may well, take the uncomfortable self and visualize the giving of healing and love to this self. You would do just such for another. You also may do this for the self. When the self is somewhat comforted, the gaze again may be turned to the observation and watching of the working out of the destiny requested by the purified desire already spent. Faithfully and trustingly place the deeper observational self, with eyes clear and alert, at the right hand of all that occurs; but ask for the patience and the faith to remain an observer while a process seems to be working itself out.
All your work as an entity of spirit is groundwork laid in before confusion overtakes one. Once the cloud of confusion is there, the realization simply may be maintained and remembered that this was asked for, this is occurring, and this is a time-bound phenomenon. In this way, you are able to affirm your own desires, to comfort your own discomfort, and to position the heart open and lovingly addressing the confusion in tones of faith in the process and trust in the kindly nature of the Creator, which allowed you as co-creator to create this vortex of transformation and to go through it, powered by desire.
Now Q’uo said that if one strongly desires to experience the transformation of change it is necessary to look from the larger perspective to see the confusion that comes with change and exercise patience and comfort for the self because “you are asking about changing a beingness, changing the way of perceiving and experiencing one’s own essence, and this is endlessly subtle work.” Then Q’uo said that one could give love and healing to the uncomfortable self and then faithfully become the observer of one’s destiny that has been so strongly desired as this process works itself out. Q’uo went on to say that this process of transformation was pre-incarnatively chosen, so it is well to open the heart to love and faith in the confusion of the process of change, and to trust the kindly Creator which allowed the creation of this vortex of transformation which is powered by one’s desire. On November 2, 2003, Q’uo described the process of transformation:
One cannot drag oneself, reluctantly, to embrace transformation. It certainly can happen that way, for the energies of transformation are absolutely unstoppable. Evolution will occur automatically. It is just rather slow compared to the rate of change that is possible when an entity has decided to cooperate and to lean into the process of transformation.
Again and again it is necessary to come to the center of self with open hands, empty hands, full of unknowing, full of all of the colors that have painted your world within the last little while, whether those colors be bright and cheerful chintzes or deep purples and browns and blacks coming from difficult experiences. All of these gifts may be taken into that place and laid before the infinite One, so that you have empty hands, you have an open heart, and you are on your knees, in terms of being without pride, without arrogance, without the need to be sure or to be right.
You ask, “What can be done to aid the process of change, to ameliorate the discomfort of the confusion?” Firstly, we do not recommend attempts to become comfortable. If change is comfortable, it is likely not to be effectual. One wishing change is dealing with power which is moving in one direction. This power and all its ramifications are being asked to alter their vectors. In any study of movement of things with weight, one can see clearly the mechanics of turning to be those of the braking, the balancing, the changes in the steering, and so forth. A good deal of dynamic work is done when there is momentum to overcome and a new direction to be taken and then to be accelerated in the new direction.
So, too, when doing work in consciousness, you have a certain amount of spiritual mass which has a certain amount of momentum. When change is desired, prayed and asked for, visualized and preparations made, then there is a very graceful moment available when the realization may come that the spiritual visualization preceding change has been completed, and now the spirit, along with the conscious self in incarnation, must hang on for a bumpy ride, for there will be the braking to overcome momentum, the proper shift in direction which takes several adjustments, and then the process of gradual addition of power to the direction so that the pace is accelerated once again. The one who attempts to wrest change too quickly is doing work against the self and subverting his own spiritual, purified desires.
The various helps mentioned as possibilities—such as working with dreams, changes in diet, and so forth—are valuable individually insofar as they offer to a seeker a comfort. What is most uncomfortable about confusion? It is the disorder. It is the feeling that one is out of control. Those who seek tend to see this feeling, which is natural, and say “I should not be feeling off-balanced; I should be clear.” But “should” is not an helpful word. The way one should be is the way one is. We do not mean to split hairs, but to take one word out of the language would be perhaps rewarding to those moving through change, and this word is “should.” The heart has a wisdom concerning time which the mind lacks. Thusly, it is well to let the heart choose what form of comfort it may appropriately and skillfully take to bolster the endurance while going through transformation.
Such things as the cleansing of the diet may well give one a feeling of more control. The keeping of the dream notebook is a way of glimpsing the material which the deeper mind is discovering, recovering, and restructuring, and this may give one a deeper sense of some control in understanding the process. But, intrinsic to the process are two things: the willingness to endure through discomfort, and the faith that invokes unlimited patience, for the time of change is, in spiritual terms, timeless. Yet, that instant which in time/space exists for so long, being fully potentiated to come into manifestation in space/time, occupies a variable amount of space/time in the experience of one in incarnation. Thusly, there is not a standard waiting period, and patience needs to be given without limit.
One thing we do recommend for all who experience confusion is a very well-encouraged sense of humor. The most helpful point of view for a changing spiritual seeker is light-hearted irreverence. Play with that which is occurring. Be playful. Allow the vision to relax, the eyesight to become less than entirely single-mindedly keen when the pressure mounts and the anxiety builds, when frustration and anger begin to accumulate. Lighten your own load with laughter. And if you can laugh with another, the strength of this joy is doubled. Part of the service spiritual seekers may be to each other is to exhort and encourage each other to take it easier with the situation and the self.
Many are the times when a serious seeker feels very inadequate to that which he wishes to accomplish. The earnestness begins to become more tight and urgent. The seriousness is taken further and further until this beau geste consumes one. To a point, this intensity is helpful. Beyond that point, it always needs to be remembered that the most serious things in a life experience are made more clear and understandable by the enhancement of turning the spotlight off the seriousness of the situation and onto the beauty, the praiseworthy beauty, of the overall plan.
When one may praise the plan and give thanks for going through the necessary confusion, one is then taking very seriously and single-mindedly the transformation itself, but has let up the pressure on the self to do “such and such” or not do “such and such” in conjunction with this transformation. To take the principles, the ideals, seriously is excellent; to take the self seriously is folly. Let the self be human. Laugh at this humanity. Love it and see that it is perfectly normal to fear that which is painful.
Here Q’uo said that we should not attempt to be comfortable in times of change as our life’s momentum is moving us in a different direction, and we will also subvert our spiritual desires if we attempt to change too quickly. Q’uo continued by saying that the most uncomfortable thing about change is things being out of order or out of control, but we would benefit by letting the heart, rather than the mind, determine the process and time of transformation to occur. Then Q’uo said that we could gain some sense of control of this process by changing our diet or working with dreams to access the workings of our deeper mind, but more important would be the willingness to endure discomfort and the faith that invokes unlimited patience since spiritual transformation is timeless. They also suggested that when the process of change evokes anxiety, anger, or frustration that a sense of humor is a valuable ally, especially if shared with a friend. They said we should let our self be human and laugh at the process of change and love it. In 34.6, Ra made this same suggestion:
We observed your interest in the catalyst of pain. This experience is most common among your entities. The pain may be of the physical complex. More often it is of the mental and emotional complex. In some few cases the pain is spiritual in complex-nature. This creates a potential for learning. The lessons to be learned vary. Almost always these lessons include patience, tolerance, and the ability for the light touch.
In this group there is not the holding of the fear to the self, for which we would need to request correction; there is only the judgment of the self by the self as the self sees that it has fear. May we say that, in our opinion, fear is a normal and healthy reaction to pain. When you were small you recoiled from the touch to the oven. This was wise. Now you put yourself to more subtle testing of the boundaries and nature of your journey. You will frequently touch something very “hot” and have the healthy fear which allows you to recoil and remove the self from spiritual or mental pain. Allow yourself to move naturally and vulnerably through the unknown. Accept and love the fear, the frustration, the anger. Note them. Honor them. Comfort the self experiencing them, but do not deny them their appropriateness.
Why should you not feel the difficult process happening? Why should the changes not cause many bumps, stops, and starts, and discomforts, which express themselves in manifestations of fear, anger, and frustration? When the unknown has been penetrated by desire, the new country cannot even be seen. A transforming individual is mapping for the first of many times the new and changing territory of its road. The way is mazed and muddled, and, in many ways, the sensing self is blinded by so much incoming data concerning a novel situation. The computer mind of the physical body gives many, many alarms when receiving this kind of data from the meta-program. The resulting fear, anger or frustration is completely understandable and acceptable, at least to us.
We hope we have enabled you to have compassion upon yourselves. You have asked a question which can only be asked by those who are consciously working within themselves and who have accomplished to have purified the desire and begun to co-create a life in faith. We speak to experienced wayfarers and we say to you: When did you expect to be perfect, comfortable or settled if you wish to be a pilgrim on this particular road to infinity? You know well you expected none of those things. Comfort yourself, therefore, through the frustration. Love yourself through the anger. And cherish yourself through the depression and the grieving at the loss of the old, familiar ways. Above all, release the spirit pilgrim from the strictures of perceived time and know with every fiber of the being that the Creator’s time will become your time at the absolute moment of manifestation of transformation. Watch, wait, pray, praise, and give thanks. Always give thanks. And this thanks and praise will inform to a great degree the attitude that must lighten up the load of negative emotion.
We cheer you on in your desires and we are sympathetic with the painfulness of transformation, but we realize you wish to know not only comfortable words, but uncomfortable ones, if we feel them to be true. We do feel that it is just to experience negative emotions in an illusion which seems chaotic. We exhort you to lean on praise and thanksgiving, and then, filled with this buoyancy of spirit, gaze again and again with compassion on the weary, weary traveler that is your outer conscious self.
Now Q’uo said that fear is natural, and we should accept and love the fear and comfort ourselves as we move through this unknown territory of transformation that contains so much new data for a totally new experience. Then Q’uo said that we are co-creating a life in faith on a spiritual journey that is infinite, and we should comfort, love, and cherish ourselves through all the anger, depression, and loss of our old ways of being. They went on to say that we should have faith that the time of the manifestation of our transformation will come when the Creator’s time becomes our time, and that we should always give praise and thanksgiving for this process of change and look with compassion on our conscious self. On November 3, 1996, Q’uo spoke of the nature of the process of change:
Each of you has this sterling opportunity to break through the defenses, the shells, the masks that each has gathered about itself to defend itself from those pains which it fears. And the answer to these pains and difficulties is simply to accept them, to embrace them, to walk through them by faith, working in each case to see the love that is in the moment and to be a part of that which is good for all those whom you meet. You see, the confusions, the difficulties, the suffering are symptoms, shall we say, of the process of change or transformation when you have incomplete information. Each of you has woefully incomplete information in the conscious mind.
We apologize for taking this much time with this query, but we felt that there was no quicker way to express what are a fairly complex and subtle series of points which attempt to ground you in a new way of perceiving the spirit self in transformation. We would, at this time, thank this instrument and transfer from it that the one known as Jim may conclude the session. We leave this instrument in love and in light. We are those of Q’uo.
This morning I had an appointment with a dental surgeon to discuss how to deal with two sores that are in the gums above the teeth. He said that these sores were located above my canine teeth and had probably become injured at some point and that surgery was not necessary. eWhen I left the dental surgeon’s office I drove over to Thieneman’s Nursery to buy two more flats of snapdragons, zinnias, and dianthus. I also bought four pots of coral bells and a couple flats of double impatiens. Then I went by Paul’s Fruit Market and bought some food for myself. My last stop was a Walgreen’s to buy some Tylenol and some Glucosamine Chondroitin. When I got home I began my transplanting of flowers and completed the
This afternoon I went back outside and completed the transplanting of the all the flowers that I bought this morning, so I returned to Thieneman’s Nursery to buy two more flats of double impatiens, two more flats of Zinnias, four more pots of coral bells, and one more flat of dianthus that I hope to plant tomorrow morning.
From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:
April 18
The Inward House Of Prayer
I am of the principle of the love of Jesus the Christ, and I greet you in the full consciousness of that living love.
If you seek to do the Father’s will this day, be not satisfied with actions which leave a residue within the mind and spirit of anxiety, restlessness, and fatigue. For if these things are felt, then mundane concerns have not been sacrificed in order that the Spirit may be dead to Earth and made alive to the moving will of the Creator.
If goodly and Godly effort has fatigued you, turn to the inward house of prayer and offer up the self with all of the opinions and requirements of the world in which you live.
And await the refreshment that the Spirit gives to those who pray. For it is the soul refreshed in Spirit which faces all earthly tasks without a sense of labor and all mundane toils without the expectation of fatigue.
Be only satisfied in prayer when the state of mind that is within you is that the world is alive and filled with joy, as the Spirit moves and recreates all that there is to become more and more the image and manifestation of Love.
We leave you in the inward peace which is the hallmark of the consciousness of Love amidst any circumstance. Amen.
I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:
We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light, and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.
