I'm a bigot

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

I don't get why you always come to say that the Creator does not care. How does the Creator not care when it is what is experiencing your every pain and processing the every thoughts you are sharing. You words are the Creator's words about it's own experience of itself.

Picture that there is the Source, nothing else but one singularity that is perfectly unified, and that your awareness is exactly that but veiled into being individualized of the rest of yourself, finite among infinity. Spiritual evolution works toward breaking down these barriers/veils until no octaves, densities, separation of any kind are left. Just an intelligent infinity that always come to accept/love every experience it ever has and incorporates the mirror unto itself.

I get the creator cares.  It also doesn't care.  The Creator is all things, Min, not just one or the other.

But otherwise, I have the exact same logic as you do.  Just lack the rationale in my anger and irritation at myself.  Worse monsters get killed with extreme prejudice, see where that leads to?  War.  We're already here, when will it actually stop in real life?

I don't know why I care so much and get so furiously mad about these things.  I honestly wish I didn't care, but it's because I do I don't know what to do anymore that will make a noticeable change in people's lives around me.  Doing the Law of One only helped myself, and what people I did help, I can't say it did anything but give them a memory, that in retrospect, won't even be remembered after a point.  I'm small, I'm nothing, can't do anything.

Feel mad, see a lot of bad, obviously means there's a lot of bad in me, don't want to be it, go crazy and become it anyways?

I don't believe so, I think what I feel is pretty valid, as well as anyone's ridicule of my feelings or what not.

What might screw with people is even though I can self-identify as a monster, I don't typically, as well as don't assign that label to people typically, because I love myself, and people.

I just hate the bad in all of us now.  I'm tired of it all, inside of myself and others, I accept it and understand to some personal level of reality, why bad must exist, why bad isn't bad, why 'wrong' is in itself wrong/right.

But!  In emotion, when you're in it, I don't see many justifications or rationale or reasons that...promptly provide any form of...understanding or relief, or even steadily or slowly provide any such explanations about 'why' these things are happening 'at all'.  The various explanations are as good as any, all could literally be valid one way or another.

Emotions go much more deeper, and then the results is basically logic begins breaking down, irrational and rational become one, everything gets more involved.  In this place where that information isn't available, emotions seriously hurt.

@TTP
You are the "monster" whom you are talking about. There is no escape from yourself.

I know, as are all of you.

I don't get why that doesn't bother you guys honestly.  It freaks me out.

I guess I don't dwell on the same kind of thoughts as you do. I prefer love, thanksgiving, acceptance and enjoying myself (as well as "others")

No offense implied, as I appreciate your contrarian views.

Nothing can bother you unless you want or allow it to.

I'm trying to spiritually murder the god inside of me... (or make it all stop/cease?)

Good luck with that. "God" has no "Life" to take. He is Sovereign. Alpha and Omega. There is no end to suffering.

You are allegedly not trying to "escape", but my point still stands. You don't have many options, as you can either choose the path of acceptance or the path of seperation.

Why can't everyone just Be Nice to each other???

Because that would make it too easy.

If you truly wanted to live in a world where everyone is loving and considerate, I'd say you'd be there in the first place. Maybe you wanted to spice things up a bit.

I'm the Monster who kills monsters.

Reminds me of Alucard from Hellsing Ultimate. I used to love that anime but in hindsight I think it is rather juvenile and petty.

If I could, I would be a monster hunter (the games are really fun too actually), and I'd just vigilante horrible people.

I like to be "evil" in videogames. A warlock who summons monsters from the pits of hell, a sociopathic gangbanger, or a cybernetic intelligence that enslaves humans by stripping them of their individuality. A fun contrast from real life where I feel guilty for stepping on grass.

It's like that picture with the dog in the burning house holding a tea cup, and hes just like, 'This is Fine'.  ...Is it really fine though?

Good point, it's why I don't really expect much to come out of it, life/less, the perfect means of immortality.  I honestly disagree with your Choice A or B summation.  Why not both?  C.  Both.  I'm a Human, and a Soul, I've explored my soul side emotionally pretty decently, I have a good idea of who I am, and love myself for it.  So now I'm checking out the Human side and -whooooohooyoowoah, angry!  Angry angry!  Angry and annoyed and pissed off!  A lot.

You could say I'm just not pleased with the way life is for people in general, not just for myself.  OR for animals.  Or even material objects...

Add in all this extra filler info regards polarity, wars, right and wrong, lack of, and it's a very intense filter for all of that, it's like...  It's like a volcano, and the emotion is like fuel, and the surroundings are providing the fuel.  And I usually just boil, or 'seethe' with irritation lately, at life on earth for many people in general.  I'd send them love except just like I think praying is a small means and basically a waste of time (I know it's actually metaphysically, really not!) and similarly I think 'sending love' isn't much better beyond thinking happy thoughts for suffering people.  Instead I do what I can for them where I've the power to do so.  It's my way, I'm serious and critical, I'm a bit cold and apathetic now too.  I don't want to be, but I am regardless because I have to be to deal with the endless onslaught of seeing people suffer each day.

Regards spicing things up.  I think by the sensation of weariness I've had all my life.

I think I'm here trying to just god damn get this incarnation over with, and tired of 3D and Earth and want to get the hell away and go enjoy myself in a different friggen galaxy where people can darn interact with each other face to face and not want to hurt them for looking a certain way or being a certain way.  Spice, no, I wanted everything nice, less spice more nice, and maybe a way lot of sugar

How is being nice too easy?  I'm nice to my Mom every day and it's the HARDEST damn thing I have ever had to do sometimes.  How is being nice too easy??  If that were true, everyone would be doing it by default!
No, E_s, in my view, Being nice is hard to do for your typical person unaware and uncaring on the street.  Maybe it's easy in neutrality for many, but when being confronted with anger and fury, it is no different than braving a flood with your bare body, you can either fight it, or let it go, when you fight, you usually lose.  Being nice requires letting go, whether it be in apathy or empathy, it need be done first to properly convey niceness honestly.
Least that's what I do when facing, 'do hath I desire or hell shall fall upon thee' attitudes from my Mother.  Or very furious customers who are insulting me directly.

It is petty, you should watch Code Geass, that'll show you just how petty and juvenile it can be.
But then again I too am very petty, and irrationally so, can be juvenile (least I think so) at many times.  So it makes sense, it just means I need to balance, something I'll begin in my meditations soon, since I'm beginning to notice how bad things are getting for me through my own self.

Maybe I need to find a job not in customer service.  God, maybe that's my second only problem.  First being I'm emotionally a wreck and need to get that figured out instead of blaming God, lol.

I can be serious, it's just me, but I can't stand it.  Am I the only one who feels these things, these ways?

I play good morality in video games always.  I only recently played Fallout NV and Skyrim as a neutral character who killed more openly annoying npc's or stole from them.  I don't like being cruel even in video games.  I even hate cruel porn and can't stand cruel people.  Cruelty is just, so; Self explanatory.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels pain or what you attribute 'guilty' as when stepping on grass.  I think concrete likes it though, maybe to it I'm soft, whereas to grass, I'm crazy solid, or lethally so...

I imagine pencils dislike being sharpened, but like being sharp.
Whereas Knives might enjoy being sharpened, and sharp.

I see how some see me as humanizing some things too much.  Especially with 2D items and 1D items.  I'll have to balance that out, it's just so scary to think.  I'm always hurting something just to survive.  I dislike feeling like a parasite, or a virus if you've seen The Matrix.

Well thank you for talking with me folks, I've processed myself pretty decently and am relatively shocked at my own state of being.

Time to just settle down and stop for a bit, I hope Aion or someone else will consider reiki for me while I return to my own roots right in the Ra Material itself, and unjumble my own madness.

...Again...

[Diana]

The Creator (assuming there is one) in my opinion does not care. Not because it can and doesn't (which implies a choice to care rather than not care), but because it would presumably be detached and objective. Caring is a human construct. 

Believing in a caring Creator reflects ideas such as Christianity, and our essential feeling of aloneness in this vast universe. Projecting onto a Creator human emotions is exactly the mistake Christianity makes. I don't need to spell out the contradictions of a heavenly father. And if the Creator is experiencing manyness, how then can it care? All is one. As many here have stated, the Creator experiences all things without judgment, so it follows that it is objective and detached from outcomes. This is similar to the wave function which makes sense. 

The idea that the Creator is love doesn't even make sense, unless you view love as an objective, unconditional field of manyness, the all, unmanifest infinity. By no definition humans can define does this equal caring. It suggests allowing, but not the human emotion of caring. Caring, because it is an aspect of infinity being played out and experienced by souls on the 3D (and other) stage(s), would be part of the Creator's experience, but the Creator didn't choose it, we did. And because caring is part of intelligent infinity, it would be a tiny aspect in an infinite soup of everything. So to say the Creator cares, would be the same as saying the Creator doesn't care.

For me, the only way it makes sense that there is a OIC, or just a field of infinite possibilities, is that that source is without bias (and of course this fits with the LOO). So if there is no bias, how can the field of infinite possibilities, or the OIC, care?

On the other hand, we presumably have infinite life in this universe on many levels. We have higher density beings. There is a hierarchy of sorts, or paths of unfolding. So to disagree with the way things have been set up here, and I often do when I am feeling less detached, would be to address some of those beings who were involved in these experiments. The OIC is just there experiencing it all, or could be said to be providing an environment—vast as it could be imagined to be—in which it all could play out as it will. 

[earth_spirit]

-----

[Diana]

@ TTP:

I understand your frustration. Things can get overwhelming here.

The way I deal with this is to live my life with respect for all things. I care this way even for inanimate objects. A lot of my household items are decades old because I handle them with care. 

This is something I had tried to get across in the meat threads. Ideally, wouldn't you like to live in a society that caused no harm to anything? Where you didn't harm grass by stepping on it, or kill things to survive? I do not see this desire as not accepting what is; rather, I see it as an environment one resonates with more. So in my case, I make choices based on causing the least harm here in a world of much suffering. I make these decisions with both my heart and my intellect. This is where you might find some balance. Let the intellect engage more and be reasonable with how you must exist here. 

I also resonate with your feelings about your mother. I have a similar situation. I am conflicted all the time trying to balance kindness with truth. I must consider that part of my conflict is in my own reactions based on subconscious triggers. Regardless that they were embedded there during childhood, they are mine to deal with. So, as much as I may have negative feelings toward my mother, I try to see her as just another human, not my mother. And in this way I can be kind without compromising my truth. For instance, I don't tell her I love her. It makes me feel sick to say it, so no matter how much I intuit that she wants that, I don't martyr myself to it and say it anyway for her sake because it's simply not true—not in the way she is wanting it. I can be kind in an objective way, but I won't sacrifice my self for another self, whose needs are just as biased and psychologically unsound as the next person. "To thine own self be true" mitigated with objective kindness is what I strive for.

One may accept that one is here, in 3D, and chose to be for whatever reasons, but it does not follow that one must be OF this place and play by 3D prompts. One can be "in this world but not of it."

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

"I actually love my body far more than myself. Such a beautiful and sensual vehicle that I don't feel I deserve."

I feel this except backwards. I feel like my body doesn't deserve a cruel being like me. Because I designed its extreme capacity for agony. Because as it should be is in itself designed that way, the soul, the creator Creates and manifests the reality through Creator created metaphysics through Creator Intelligence Creating Creation via Spacial dimensions from a space devoid of dimension but only in form, not presence.

I get it man, now I'm questioning it. I...I do that.

Regards more ways than I can imagine...I can Imagine many ways, please don't indulge this task upon my mind :l

Diana, I always like your inputs. I can't argue objective being detached. I just fear it, for I know the potential ramifications. I hope that it is to a degree, benevolent towards suffering...

But I doubt it is anything at all. Which is basically indifferent to human terms emotionally. Basically the father who was always gone doesn't hold feelings for the child potentially metaphorically. Detachment.

Thanks for the inputs everyone.

E_s, I stagger walk, or 'saunter' (i think I'm emphasizing it for myself actually) when avoiding things. The drunken manner of physically moving fluidly in avoidance was well learned by I!

11:11!
I live in a peaceful loving universe. Who won't turn out to be an abusive lover.

[Minyatur]

The Creator (assuming there is one) in my opinion does not care. Not because it can and doesn't (which implies a choice to care rather than not care), but because it would presumably be detached and objective. Caring is a human construct. 

Believing in a caring Creator reflects ideas such as Christianity, and our essential feeling of aloneness in this vast universe. Projecting onto a Creator human emotions is exactly the mistake Christianity makes. I don't need to spell out the contradictions of a heavenly father. And if the Creator is experiencing manyness, how then can it care? All is one. As many here have stated, the Creator experiences all things without judgment, so it follows that it is objective and detached from outcomes. This is similar to the wave function which makes sense. 

The idea that the Creator is love doesn't even make sense, unless you view love as an objective, unconditional field of manyness, the all, unmanifest infinity. By no definition humans can define does this equal caring. It suggests allowing, but not the human emotion of caring. Caring, because it is an aspect of infinity being played out and experienced by souls on the 3D (and other) stage(s), would be part of the Creator's experience, but the Creator didn't choose it, we did. And because caring is part of intelligent infinity, it would be a tiny aspect in an infinite soup of everything. So to say the Creator cares, would be the same as saying the Creator doesn't care.

For me, the only way it makes sense that there is a OIC, or just a field of infinite possibilities, is that that source is without bias (and of course this fits with the LOO). So if there is no bias, how can the field of infinite possibilities, or the OIC, care?

On the other hand, we presumably have infinite life in this universe on many levels. We have higher density beings. There is a hierarchy of sorts, or paths of unfolding. So to disagree with the way things have been set up here, and I often do when I am feeling less detached, would be to address some of those beings who were involved in these experiments. The OIC is just there experiencing it all, or could be said to be providing an environment—vast as it could be imagined to be—in which it all could play out as it will. 

Yeah but the Creator is the experiencer of it all, so our existence denotes a desire to be as us, in this many-ness. So in a way it does care about being us who are sub-sequent thoughts of the original thought.

Our experiences of being separate of the OIC is what is desired to be explored, but all paths merge back where it all originated from. Our existence is an investment/focus of the source, each an equal focus of infinity into a separate reality of it all.

[Aion]

Where do you think human emotions come from if not a reflection of the Macrocosm of the OIC?

I think the OIC cares to a degree that is unfathomable to the human mind. It is for the human mind to say things are like this or not like that. The OIC is all things. To exclude from it any characteristic is, in my opinion, to break its unity.

I think humans want a neutral, uncaring Creator because it justifies the suffering. Humans are obsessed with things 'making sense'.

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

@ TTP:

I understand your frustration. Things can get overwhelming here.

The way I deal with this is to live my life with respect for all things. I care this way even for inanimate objects. A lot of my household items are decades old because I handle them with care. 

This is something I had tried to get across in the meat threads. Ideally, wouldn't you like to live in a society that caused no harm to anything? Where you didn't harm grass by stepping on it, or kill things to survive? I do not see this desire as not accepting what is; rather, I see it as an environment one resonates with more. So in my case, I make choices based on causing the least harm here in a world of much suffering. I make these decisions with both my heart and my intellect. This is where you might find some balance. Let the intellect engage more and be reasonable with how you must exist here. 

I also resonate with your feelings about your mother. I have a similar situation. I am conflicted all the time trying to balance kindness with truth. I must consider that part of my conflict is in my own reactions based on subconscious triggers. Regardless that they were embedded there during childhood, they are mine to deal with. So, as much as I may have negative feelings toward my mother, I try to see her as just another human, not my mother. And in this way I can be kind without compromising my truth. For instance, I don't tell her I love her. It makes me feel sick to say it, so no matter how much I intuit that she wants that, I don't martyr myself to it and say it anyway for her sake because it's simply not true—not in the way she is wanting it. I can be kind in an objective way, but I won't sacrifice my self for another self, whose needs are just as biased and psychologically unsound as the next person. "To thine own self be true" mitigated with objective kindness is what I strive for.

One may accept that one is here, in 3D, and chose to be for whatever reasons, but it does not follow that one must be OF this place and play by 3D prompts. One can be "in this world but not of it."

I fell asleep before I posted my reply lol...

I've been trying to find a balance between heart and mind.  Im not in a place to say I did so successfully however.
Try again they say.

Every day I try.  I hope to get it right one of these days.

Your final words do help.  Not much with the loneliness, but much so with the comprehension.

[Billy]

God is good.  I refuse to accept anything else.  The thought of a detached and uncaring Creator is unbearable to me. All the hope I have comes from the sincere belief that my/our Creator loves me deeply and wants to see me and all beings happy, free and fulfilled. I can't really imagine or consider anything else. Yes, God is good.

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

I think so too.  But Humanely Good, I just don't think so.

Imagine my horror when I didn't even Think it did care, at all.

Feels like I'm a little piece of glitter to be snuffed out if I lose my lustrous sparkle.  I don't know how Christianity got so far with just the Old Testament...I would've deemed Christianity Satanic if not for Satanism already existing just based on god's behavior lol...

Yeah man.  It IS basically unbearable.  The worst mental horror I've known yet personally in my life.

Would even call it traumatic were it not insulting to actual traumatizing occurrences.

[Diana]

It is very scary to look into the void, the abyss. I only have working theories and based on all things being possible, I can't be so sure as some that our existence is this way or that.

I have attached a relevant song (a very long one) by Nightwish, a (fantastic) Finnish symphonic metal band, that talks about evolution and quotes some passages by Richard Dawkins in it. The words are below. If nothing else, even if this existence is nothing more than an evolving soup of elements, gases, and remnants of an exploding singularity, there is still so much beauty and majesty, which is the subject of this song.

 

. Four Point Six

Archaean horizon
The first sunrise
On a pristine Gaea
Opus perfectum
Somewhere there, us sleeping

[Spoken]
"After sleeping through a hundred million centuries
We have finally opened our eyes on a sumptuous planet
Sparkling with color, bountiful with life
Within decades we must close our eyes again
Isn't it a noble, an enlightened way of spending our brief
Time in the sun, to work at understanding the universe
And how we have come to wake up in it?"

II. Life

The cosmic law of gravity
Pulled the newborns around a fire
A careless, cold infinity
In every vast direction
Lonely farer in the Goldilocks zone
She has a tale to tell
From the stellar nursery into a carbon feast
Enter LUCA

The tapestry of chemistry
There's a writing in the garden
Leading us to the mother of all

[Chorus 1]
We are one
We are the universe
Forbears of what will be scions of the Devonian sea
Aeons pass, writing the tale of us all
A day-to-day new opening
For the greatest show on Earth

Ion channels
Welcoming the outside world to the stuff of stars
Bedding the tree of a biological holy
Enter life

The tapestry of chemistry
There's a writing in the garden
Leading us to the mother of all

[Chorus 1]

We are here to care for the garden
The wonder of, birth of, every form most beautiful
Every form most beautiful

[Chorus 1]

III. The Toolmaker

After a billion years
The show is still here
Not a single one of your fathers died young
The handy travelers out of Africa
Little Lucy of the Afar

Gave birth to fantasy
To idolatry
To self destructive weaponry

Enter the god of gaps
Deep within the past
Atavistic dread of the hunted

Enter Ionia
The cradle of thought
The architecture of understanding
The human lust to feel so exceptional
To rule the Earth

Hunger for shiny rocks
For giant mushroom clouds
The will to do just as you'd be done by
Enter history
The grand finale
Enter ratkind

[Chorus 2 (x3)]
Man, he took his time in the sun
Had a dream to understand
A single grain of sand
He gave birth to poetry
But one day'll cease to be
Greet the last light of the library

We were here! (x4)

IV. The Understanding
[Spoken]
"We are going to die, and that makes us the lucky ones. Most people are never going to die because they are never going to be born. The potential people who could have been here in my place but who will in fact never see the light of day outnumber the sand grains of Sahara. Certainly those unborn ghosts include greater poets than Keats, scientists greater than Newton. We know this because the set of possible people allowed by our DNA so massively exceeds the set of actual people. In the teeth of these stupefying odds it is you and I, in our ordinariness, that are here. We privileged few, who won the lottery of birth against all odds, how dare we whine at our inevitable return to that prior state from which the vast majority have never stirred?"

"There is grandeur in this view of life, with its several powers, having been originally breathed into a few forms or into one. And that whilst this planet has gone cycling on according to the fixed law of gravity, from so simple a beginning endless forms most beautiful and most wonderful have been, and are being, evolved."

V. Sea-Worn Driftwood
[Instrumental]

[Aion]

The Void is Void. Emptiness of emptiness. The Great Mystery.