[split] "Some people eat animals, some don't."

[Diana]

Okay, it doesn't make more sense from my perspective. I don't think either have any form of contract or agreement to be consumed per se however they are involved in the conditions of the vibration of their density. There are conditions that are involved with incarnation that have been agreed to.

However, I would make the point that as I understand it the entity does not choose consciously the elements of its incarnation but rather lives are organized by guardians whom attempt to situate them so they can make the progression from second to third density.

So, it then seems a little strange to me that such guardians would allow and create so many second density lives under conditions of suffering, plant and animal alike. I realized however that there were density laws that had to be fulfilled. For example, they can't just stop incarnating animals so that no more bodies that experience suffering can be created because there are planetary karmic patterns at play which tie them in to a particular theme or leitmotif, as Ra might say, of experience. In this way, I see the planet as exploring itself.

I respect your perspective above and the study behind it. I don't like the idea that "guardians" are choosing for us or for anything. That doesn't mean its not true. To speak to what the guardians might or might not do: animal and plant life suffers to the extent it does because we humans are doing it to them. Perhaps the guardians didn't foresee that and don't know what to do about it. It's chaos theory all over the place here.

I understand your suppositions above, and especially about the planet exploring itself. But none of this changes that fact that I will not participate in obvious suffering. This is where I think we don't align. What I see as obvious is not seen the same way by you. If you know me at all from this forum, you will know that I have repeatedly said "wrong" and "right" have no relevance outside of human judgment, so I am not saying I am right and you are wrong.

I really do see what you are saying, it's just that my own experience has informed me differently as to the appropriate position to approach from. I see plants and animals as equal, I see both as having potential and capability for higher being, and I see it that I have to take energy in to this body for it to operate in this density. I don't think anything is automatically designated 'food', I think that is a description of something much more basic.

I do not view my fellow selves as food, the food is the energy. This has been an increasing issue for me lately and it is worrying my girlfriend because I am having a hard time eating. I have no appetites. However when I do crave it is almost always for meats, salts, proteins (I don't feel at all satisfied by just nuts) and a huge wave of guilt because I had somehow built it in to my philosophy that that was fundamentally evil. I am realizing it is functional.

I have a lot of issues with vital energy for the last bit of time as I have seemingly attempted to 'dehumanise' myself to be more accepted in the eyes of apparent compassion. I'm beginning to see however that I've been having an enormous repression within myself because of these rules and expectations I have had for myself that I, and this is absolutely key to my point, do NOT actually believe in in my heart.

I realized that I have been so heavily swayed by others' justifications that I have constantly been trying to suppress what I actually feel is true and natural. 

I see your logic, I see your love and compassion, I assure you, I see from your eyes, but I ask, can you see from mine?

I think you are evolving and questioning and becoming more consciously aware of the choices you make, in deeper ways that include more than what we normally perceive. You are agonizing over things because apparently that is our lot as we grow, but it doesn't follow that we have to go through pain—I think we do it to ourselves. I feel for you, as I have these conflicts with myself almost on a daily basis. I read once about an ET society who had visited us and described their culture (and it's irrelevant whether or not it's true); and that they used a mild form of telekinesis when walking so as not to cause harm to the grass (which highlighted for me that I keep so much at bay all the time to just be here). 

I have found that being true to yourself can be complicated. Some of the things you have been describing here about balancing yourself are similar to what I have been trying to do, so I do understand. If you feel you need those foods—for whatever reason—then it is solely your choice and your body and your integrity you are honoring.

It has been proven that consuming 1/3 less than the minimum calories thought necessary to sustain life actually extends life significantly. So I wouldn't worry too much about not eating. If you could choke down a green drink every day it would provide you with concentrated nutrition. 

Qlin (channeled by a friend of mine and with whom I have a longstanding relationship) always says to follow your "knowing." He says to get out of your mind and your emotions and connect with your knowing. I know what he means. There are moments when we make a decision and it feels like a key has turned a lock, it just feels right and we are filled with a knowing that yes, this is it.