Concerned about timelines.

[Hello123]

Has the shift already happened and there is no way to change it?
I feel like complaining to someone and getting it out there to work thru it.
Complaining to my mom genuinely and letting it all hangout has helped me for real when nothing else could but she is financially supporting me and it just doesn't feel right anymore. Its like double trouble.
I struggle with things but complaining to someone who is financially supporting you doesn't feel right.
I have to let her live her life.
I forgot my point.
Since 10 days ago when i realised the oneness and the infiniteness of all things. I fell into a slump. I want to be able to meditate. Before i was only able to do it by accident.
I just want to let stuff off my chest is my point but doing it in the same manner... would be keeping myself in the same spot. I'm unsure what to do.
You know when just dont feel right.
Getting stuff off my chest might have worked at some point now it just.
If i find it to articulate a complaint here. Can someone listen please? Just listening might be enough.
There is this air of a complaint building up.