How can we accelerate our life vs. accept the dream

[breakingties]

Hi guys.

Lately i had some experiences that proved me that i am every second where i should be. So i took the accept the dream philosophy and working on myself, trying to improve myself as a human being. I developed a high degree of acceptance and faith but the physical circumstances doesn't reflect my state of being. So i am starting to question the accept the dream philosophy.

My physical circumstances:

I just finished a job and i can't find another one in my ghost town )
My parents are scared because of my psychotic episodes and they are very restrictive meaning that i want to go working in another country and they are not okey with that, because they think i will have another episode and they will not be there, and i fully understand them.
My relationships started to suck, even if i have just love for my family and my friends, they will not mirror that, and even have a strange/inapropriate behaviour towards me.

So, analyzing and pondering my life at the moment, and these circumstances, i am trying to find a way to accelerate my path, and i am questioning the accept the dream philosophy. Because of my experiences during the awakening, i became fatalist, and even when i found my freewill and start to move things in my life, i came to the conclusion that it was all an illusion.

So, i am reaching for you help and wisdom once again guys. If anyone can relate, or if you have some insights about the "How can we accelerate our life vs. accepting the dream" title please share