Letter to God

[Meerie]

Ah yes, I see what you mean. I get that if I am around others who are too open about certain sensitive topics... I tend to feel like an alien if that happens.
I also have a problem being around people who are really drunk. It scares the beejesus out of me.

[AnthroHeart]

Meerie, has that been for awhile, or more recent phenomenon, about being scared of drunk people?

It seems that now more recently, I'm finding that people scare easier than before.
I accidentally scared 3 people in the same day, not meaning to. I don't like doing that because
it's like having power over someone else.

I feel like I've come into a reality now where people scare easier. It didn't used to be the case for me. Either that or I just didn't notice before. That's fear based, and I am trying
to live in love. I found I don't want sex class anymore either. I was talking with two others before,
and they made me uncomfortable the amount they talked about it.

[Meerie]

Meerie, has that been for awhile, or more recent phenomenon, about being scared of drunk people?

Well I am usually not around drunk people, so I cannot really tell. I was in a situation where I could not avoid it, and there I noticed.

I found I don't want sex class anymore either. I was talking with two others before,
and they made me uncomfortable the amount they talked about it.

Exactly my feelings, too! It is just too much. TMI

[Oceania]

are you afraid of me?

[AnthroHeart]

No Oceania. You're a great furry friend. I still love furry.

The darker things were not furry. I associated them with furry because that was what I resonated with.
But furry to me is beautiful.

[AnthroHeart]

What I think is happening is I'm feeling the negative energies that are present on Earth, as Mother Earth works through them. It's a constant discomfort I feel in my solar plexus. At first it was so overpowering that nearly everything startled me. It's getting easier though. I still have the uneasy sensations, but it's good to know that I'm helping to transmute the energies. I've opened myself wide up, so now I feel some of what Mother Earth feels, almost continuously. At least that's my view on it. Could be completely wrong. This goes beyond my own creation. Now I'm helping with Earth's energies using solar plexus, heart and indigo chakra. My throat chakra is making me choke sometimes.

I also get physical pains at times in random places, that come and go. Nothing major, but this could also be from the energies. I attribute them to feelings of transformation, so I can always stay positive when things hurt. I must tell you Mother Earth is really using me to help her. For that I am grateful that I can serve a purpose, even if it's a bit uncomfortable. Anything to ease her sensations. She's gone through a lot. Knowing these energies can be quite maddening to me, I can't imagine what Earth has felt.

[Oceania]

lol i meant what meerie said. i don't go a day without drinking alcohol. unless i delude myself to think i can go sober. i'll send you a pm on other stuff.

[AnthroHeart]

This is a good article on facing fear.

http://multidimensions.com/Superconsciou...sness.html

[AnthroHeart]

Dear One,

I am giddy for life again. You have given me some difficult choices to make. Well, not so difficult, but tough. In these cases I must upset others in order to be my truth. I'm not used to going against what others ask of me, but to be my truth I must.

And that makes me glad that I can have the confidence to be myself. These words might not be as eloquent as those I've had in the past, but I am glad for what you have shown me.

You have shown me the heights of creation, I mean creating a whole furry universe was something else. And a galaxy as well. And you showed me the lowest humility, broken. Now past these extremes, I am glad to find balance. Continue to teach me, and bring the right teachers to me. May I shine inward with my light of a billion suns. And outward with the greatest compassion I can muster.

Thank you again for the opportunity to experience the limitations of 3D. I feel that if I had everything I wanted, life would be boring. Keep me at the right distance from your Light that is perfect for my level of development, so that I do not get burned, and so that I do not fear.

Thank you, dear One, as I journey toward my higher self, in complete merger with you.

[AnthroHeart]

I still wonder how to approach Creator without getting burned. And what it's like to be a star. And an anthro, I still wonder what it's like to be one. But other than that I am content.

This could be me in another life.



Or this:

[AnthroHeart]

Dear God,

I am confused. I find that the mystery only deepens as I increase my awareness. Am I moving closer to you, to myself, or to anything?

I know we shouldn’t ask why, but how come I was given such a strong bias? Did I program myself in this life, or did you program me? I feel so comfortable with the feeling of being an anthro within myself. It is my greatest fulfillment I am aware of. But what if, upon exiting this world at the end of incarnation, I find I am still human? My root race just has to be anthropomorphic beings, it just has to. But if it is not, can I be happy who I am forever?

What is spiritual evolvement? Can I evolve while having what my greatest desire for fulfillment tells me, or must I settle for what I end up becoming? Are cartoon beings real? Let me suspend reality for a moment and say that they are. Does my star family miss me as much as I imagine they do? Can they feel the sacrifice I feel in my heart, to where it hurts?

God, I do thank you for the ability to feel emotions as densely as I do, for the ability to allow Tao to flow freely through me. It is this that keeps me centered, even when I ponder these questions. Even with this immense centeredness, this one bias really pulls on my heartstrings. If I saw another furry anthro being, I would not hesitate to lay down my life for them. Could I say the same for another human? Well, I do see a certain amount of anthroness in other humans as well, and am beginning to understand the importance of compassion.

What density am I in? How can I approach you without getting burned? How can I fulfill my biases so that I can be at peace with who I am?

Much Love and Light,
- Indigo Gemini Wolf

Same questions to God, only deeper now.