10-09-2010, 04:06 AM
Well maybe... perhaps but doubtful HA. You see what I now understand as my "Higher" self I find out- like myself -has quite a bit of a sense of humor and Id say for the last 3 yrs I've been a regular riot... a real Jackie Gleason!
Let me backtrack so you'll understand what I'm dealing with. I’ve never been one to delve into new age stuff - I don't meditate - don't understand chakras,crystalls or any of that stuff doesn't resonate with me never has probable never will....
As early as I can remember 2yrs or before I always had this saying in my head I would say over and over..."Remember who you are and where you came from the farther you are away from birth and the closer you are to death the harder it will be to remember" So I did it. I remembered that phrase what the hell it meant I wouldn’t understand for another 40yrs+. .Now thru out my whole life I've had strange occurrences and events happen but nothing like what's been happening since 2007.
I'm a musician- guitar player - BA in classical and jazz - played and toured in various original punk bands for over 20yrs. So one nite in mid 2007 a drummer friend and I half lit decided to go back to my house and jam at 4AM I didn't have drums so I threw him a bass and said just play this. He never played bass before. Within 20min we wrote the most beautiful music I had ever wrote - somehow we each had managed to shave off a part of us and meld it together into this amazing thing. Rarely did I record myself and I didn't even have a tape recorder but by 9AM we were at RadioShack buying one...and that is when I began to wake up.
..Since then these last 3yrs have been filled with some crazy stuff but since I was already a crazy musician I kind of just went with it.
So when I found myself alone and just randomly yelling out to this George guy to shut the f*** up or go f yourself - I just thought who the hells George? I've probable been watching to much Seinfeld... but then it turned into conversation and I'd say stuff like Ok I guess your rt -or OMG that is so fn funny ha haaaaa ha!!! He is really funny so I honestly didn't care how bizarre it was. If I had multiple personality disorder at least my other self was hilarious cuz he was crackin me the hell up! Once I figured out that he was a real being just in non-physical form and that there were other beings that wanted to say hi things just really took off. It felt like I started kindergarten just after graduating college! I had to relearn the language and all that. George showed me I could connect with strings of light and be in a kind of hands across the universe you just had to feel where they were at. I always felt huge waves of white light washing thru me and exploding out into a burst of white light that could blanket regions of earth but now I understood what it was I could feel the connection a million heartbeats beating as one. I was never alone I was always part of everything. From there I learned to connect into higher realm of creating- new ideas - new technologies-new sciences - inventions- music - anything I dreamed up was at my fingertips - my friends/family where astonished at all I was visioning. I told my sister what was happening and she said it kind of sounds like this guy Abraham that Esther Hicks channels. I said whoa channels I don't know that sounds goofy I don't think I'm into that... but she made me watch it. I was like wow that is kind of what I'm doing okay this is cool. So I went on like that and I would get influxes of knowledge that I'd try to apply. I said to Di I think we chose to be here and that we did so prior to jumping into this life. I think there's a group of us actually but I'm not sure why or the reason we can't remember but there is a reason. I googled "I remember I chose to be on earth in the physical” up popped The Beacons of Light - page and The Group being channeled. I was freaked out I couldn't believe it - I called Di and forwarded the website - she starts freaking OMG it's everything you've been saying - I say "I KNOW - this is nuts this is crazy OMG' I freaked out for about week all the while channeling George and then Michael and finally my higher self. I was bombarded with images of how the EARTH was created - I mapped out it's evolution without any basis in time or Darwinism but instead from core truths manifested into the foundation building blocks of this world - when I was done it looked like the design for the bing bang theory - I was flipped out - I had a few cocktails that nite to calm my nerves. But I knew- Science would soon be re-writing our evolution when they discovered the missing piece - neither an atom nor photon but something new. It seemed for the next 6mos every other day I was writing down something science would soon discover or inventing something that was not invented or patent pending. As crazy as it all sounded it just felt right... Now as I was reading thru "The Groups" channeled messages and also some of Kryon's messages I began to feel uneasy maybe even a little angry - I kept coming across comments or statements regarding a hierarchy - that much emphasis was placed upon your name and how others viewed and judged you according to this and also the level of your ascension. It made absolutely no sense to me - we are all one - no one is better than the other we are all equal why isn't that resonating out there why?? I knew in order to get these answers I had to ask that question I really didn't want to ask. Who am I? I was fearful that the answer might have negative implications on this game this earth experiment and I dreaded finding out - I wanted to remain nameless I felt whatever my name was it didn't matter I remembered not because of who I was or what history may be attached to my name but for the simple reason that this is all I am - I am this and this is all, my core self, our core self - our core truth has no other choice but to ring out - how could anyone think the results would have ended differently??? How could we not rememeber??? And then it started to slowly make sense... I went down the shore to be by the water and I asked the question Who am I - I felt that I had something to do with the water - then I just started writing in Sumerian - Babylonian I later found out - Ea - Enki I felt a connection to this - Elohim I felt they were more scientific than anything and that they depended to much on there names and it's history - I felt I was related to Michael and his name was also Erra. As I looked at the water I could see thru it's vibrations it was moving so fast but I felt I could just push my way right thru it - as I looked around I noticed not everything was vibrating at the same speed - it seemed that those things I felt connected to were vibrating faster and then I understood what it means to create to manifest from non-physical to physical - a part of your core truth is taken and married with that which you want to create - it has no time it - it is neither physical or non physical but that margin in between and it becomes the foundation the building block / cornerstone of that universe/world from that the physical side can be built. I saw the beginnings of our universe - I was told you are 1 of the prodigal 7 the creators the visionaries, you were there when 7 was within 1 when 5 created water thru vibrational runoff and that was the creation of everything in this universe. I continued writing for another 2 days not really understanding what exactly anything meant until I went home and googled everything. Then I freaked out - Elohim - Intergalactic space counsel, aliens the greys and other bad guys - the atrocities committed against humans. I was scared I was disgusted I didn't understand anything or why it happened until that point I viewed the Earth as a world in a game board and although there were non-physical beings playing on the sidelines that was it that's as far as it went - now I can't even fathom how big it is or all that is in it - I had to digest this figure things out - I was scared I mean should I be looking over my shoulder is someone trying to take me out OMG I went to the bar tried to forget about all this suddenly this was a hell of allot bigger than I thought it was and it wasn't fun anymore - something’s wrong something’s really wrong I thought. As it sat it started to settle and I suddenly began to understand - this earth game was a dichotomy of the universe - the farther from the 1 things got the less things felt the one in everything. There has to be contrast in order to create - there has to be like and dislike - these so called bad guys weren't evil or wrong they were just doing there thing and if you didn't like it then you didn't have to be near them or you could create something that you liked.., I felt sad that the rest of the universe looked upon them so badly - it wasn't right they were part of us we are part of them they were adding to the creation process and were just as needed as everyone else. Then I knew I felt it I understood what this Earth game really meant how it is so much more than just a game how this will change everything how beautiful and amazing it really is I still weep when I say or think about this. It is the Law of One in its truest form WE ARE ALL ONE IN THE SAME, WE AS WE, YOU AS ME, ME AS YOU. WE COME FROM THE DARKNESS THAT REALIZED ITSELF AND BECAME 1. 1 BECAME 5. 5 WERE WITHIN 1. 1 BECAME 7. 7 WERE WITHIN 1 AND SO FORTH UNTIL INFINITY. WE ARE EVERYTHING AND AT ITS CORE EVERYTHING IS US
Then I realized remembering who I was who I am only further solidifies this theory - as part of being in the physical on this Earth you are given the feeling of a strong sense of individuality and you feel less connected to the one - having a name, history, genealogy is a good thing you would think but even though I didn't know why I had such a strong sense of remaining nameless that it shouldn't matter - I had no problem sacrificing myself even though I didn't know who I was so others could continue forward and win this game. Of course these fears were unfounded and just a part of being human but still my core self my truth rang thru and its incredible. I still prefer to remain nameless if not only to myself.
So all this lead me to Ra and the Law of One - the Doctrine of 7 Stanzas - Madame Blavatsky and so many other things I never even knew existed. The following is what I wrote a week after I learned all this. I don't think I am Ea or any other person re-incarnated at all - I feel that they are a part of me somehow but being in the physical it's just hard for me to completely understand how. I also don't think I was the only one playing this game or that I was the pivotal player and with out me things would have turned out differently - it is just written like that it's easier for me to understand it while being in the physical.
A nice reminder
About a week after my Bday after I digested all that new/remembered information pertaining to who I was I began to get a better understanding of it all. This was one letter that I wrote down from my higher self, Michael, George and other family and friends chimed in.
Let us tell you now so you can add this feeling to your core self. It is as much a part of you as you are of it.
You have built mountains changed worlds changed the course of mankind which in turn is redirecting the whole oneness of this universe back into itself. This universe is part of many which in turn is part of all - it has been born and reborn and will once again go thru that cycle. Each time keeping within itself the memory of it's past so it will be part of another future. Everything comes from 1 to infinity and then back to 1 to rest, sleep digest, and contemplate the new oneness of it. Then to be reborn again-spitting back out again and again while adding and morphing new revelations. This is what it is. It is all. It is life. It is everything separate but working as one. Creating new ideas and revelations in its separateness and keeping only what is true to itself by releasing everything else. This is the true idea of oneness, the ability to create separately but keeping only that which is true to all. All is all - we as we -1 in 9 - 9 in 1. You carry - you are - all that encompasses this. You are 1 of the 5, 1 in 5, 5 in 9, and 9 in 1 at the beginning of each new universe you carry with you the strength the feeling of this oneness. You carry this out and with reminding all thru its course that we as we all is all 1 is 1. Especially when new creations begin to get so far beyond this understanding-they begin to lack any concept of that - leading towards fewer keepers and more idea/creations being released. This is where we are now-in this universe -our expansion so great that our ideology is stretched and the oneness is forgotten by most leading to new ideas of little interest to all. But there are some extraordinary new revelations in this universe and you see understand before most the potential and expounded impact these will have on all future universes. So you see how funny it is to us that you doubt your ability to create and manifest when you've manifested universes and worlds within them! Oh this Earth Game this earth experiment is truly an original. Never has anything like this been done. To intentionally strip ourselves of ourselves - you saw this immediately -the whole picture/the idea - most of us still see it as a game and the ripple effects haven't been felt yet. Our own realization - the realization of this universe as being one will once gain rock thru all. So you see although you can't remember you have been a key player in this game you always knew your core self - at pivotal points in many different forms/characters you showed your truth, the truth shined so brightly that many were able to remember or at least to feel a higher purpose .You worked the game from the playing field and Michael as a spectator - between you both you made sure it was able to be played out. You both new from the beginning what potential this had beyond just a game and as the game went on so did so many others. So you created sides but in the form of teams - now some of the players and spectators are on opposing sides of you because they don't want to remember they like there individuality they are afraid they will get lost in the one not understanding that more than anything they will be more noticed more appreciated and loved. This is just fear a common factor in all the Universes. But this Game brings it to another level to turn fear into understanding. Now you are you, we are we, all is all, you are no more important than the farthest out least remembering of the oneness being- because as you bring the strength of an original creator they bring the strength of ever changing ideas/perceptions and the ability to create new realities that you being so close to the oneness wouldn't couldn't even imagine. So both are needed just as much they bring the life altering universal changing ideas and perceptions - you bring the ability to spot and nurture these ideas so they will be carried into the next universe.
,,. now this is from my blog which after much thought and contemplation I finally decided how I should sign my name - By Me - I thought that was clever - I didn't want to use my name now or any other names from the past so I thought by Me that sums up all my past. Oh how clever I thought I was - then I find out the ME is a Doctrine held by EA pertaining to the holy powers and how to make heaven on earth. Then I knew that "clever me" wasn't as clever as "clever me" and that I must think I'm a real riot fucking hilarious - oh I'll out clever clever [/u]me just you wait and see the battle has only just begun!!! And this brings me to trying to get a jump on things that may happen to me in the future - so far I've failed miserable - if it wasn't for Google I'd be so lost!!
The last thing I did and then found out later there were websites warning that this may happen but once again I was to late I just had to find out the hard way - Solar Flares and there effects on me - I feel the ground moving - so fatigued - dizzy drained I just want to watch TV and veg out - I knew it wasn't depression and I knew I needed down time what I didn't know was that it was happening and there were ways to cope - 2 - I needed to ground myself so I wouldn't go flying off and getting lost inter-dimensionally - did that what a scare - for me and the other people in that other dimension - we were all freaked until I finally figured it out - Oh I've got to ground myself in my dimension so I don't go flying around with no way to get back luckily I knew to think of something in my dimension that I didn't see in there's and bam I was back....and lastly changing my past this was a complete surprise but a nice one - I literally faced my Demons - after drawing a picture of what I thought was the demon from my childhood that made my room turn red and watched me from the doorway - I realized the closest thing it looked like was Mothman and I know it wasn't Mothman so after hours of perusing-demon images on the web I went another rout - I always thought it had something to do with Native Americans - so I researched what tribes where on the land I grew up on then looked into there mythology to see if they had any demons that matched - what I found was one item " Wallum Ollum" as I clicked the link I saw " The Red Record" I thought here we go!!! The Red Record is the oldest ancient doctrine of the Native American people - it is the Lenne-Lenape story of creation dating back to 10,000 BC - WHAT?! So there was no demon it was only the Lenni - Lenape trying to tell me there story of creation and at the top of the page there's a picture of my demon an American Indian in full garb and head gear - Catholic Religion once again putting fear into my head ha haaaaa... yes you bet that completely changes much of my past unbelievable....
So 10-10-10 what should I expect anything - I feel I have a chance of actually knowing what's happening to me while it’s happening.
Please help me stay ahead of the game at least just this once!
Thank you
Deb
Let me backtrack so you'll understand what I'm dealing with. I’ve never been one to delve into new age stuff - I don't meditate - don't understand chakras,crystalls or any of that stuff doesn't resonate with me never has probable never will....
As early as I can remember 2yrs or before I always had this saying in my head I would say over and over..."Remember who you are and where you came from the farther you are away from birth and the closer you are to death the harder it will be to remember" So I did it. I remembered that phrase what the hell it meant I wouldn’t understand for another 40yrs+. .Now thru out my whole life I've had strange occurrences and events happen but nothing like what's been happening since 2007.
I'm a musician- guitar player - BA in classical and jazz - played and toured in various original punk bands for over 20yrs. So one nite in mid 2007 a drummer friend and I half lit decided to go back to my house and jam at 4AM I didn't have drums so I threw him a bass and said just play this. He never played bass before. Within 20min we wrote the most beautiful music I had ever wrote - somehow we each had managed to shave off a part of us and meld it together into this amazing thing. Rarely did I record myself and I didn't even have a tape recorder but by 9AM we were at RadioShack buying one...and that is when I began to wake up.
..Since then these last 3yrs have been filled with some crazy stuff but since I was already a crazy musician I kind of just went with it.
So when I found myself alone and just randomly yelling out to this George guy to shut the f*** up or go f yourself - I just thought who the hells George? I've probable been watching to much Seinfeld... but then it turned into conversation and I'd say stuff like Ok I guess your rt -or OMG that is so fn funny ha haaaaa ha!!! He is really funny so I honestly didn't care how bizarre it was. If I had multiple personality disorder at least my other self was hilarious cuz he was crackin me the hell up! Once I figured out that he was a real being just in non-physical form and that there were other beings that wanted to say hi things just really took off. It felt like I started kindergarten just after graduating college! I had to relearn the language and all that. George showed me I could connect with strings of light and be in a kind of hands across the universe you just had to feel where they were at. I always felt huge waves of white light washing thru me and exploding out into a burst of white light that could blanket regions of earth but now I understood what it was I could feel the connection a million heartbeats beating as one. I was never alone I was always part of everything. From there I learned to connect into higher realm of creating- new ideas - new technologies-new sciences - inventions- music - anything I dreamed up was at my fingertips - my friends/family where astonished at all I was visioning. I told my sister what was happening and she said it kind of sounds like this guy Abraham that Esther Hicks channels. I said whoa channels I don't know that sounds goofy I don't think I'm into that... but she made me watch it. I was like wow that is kind of what I'm doing okay this is cool. So I went on like that and I would get influxes of knowledge that I'd try to apply. I said to Di I think we chose to be here and that we did so prior to jumping into this life. I think there's a group of us actually but I'm not sure why or the reason we can't remember but there is a reason. I googled "I remember I chose to be on earth in the physical” up popped The Beacons of Light - page and The Group being channeled. I was freaked out I couldn't believe it - I called Di and forwarded the website - she starts freaking OMG it's everything you've been saying - I say "I KNOW - this is nuts this is crazy OMG' I freaked out for about week all the while channeling George and then Michael and finally my higher self. I was bombarded with images of how the EARTH was created - I mapped out it's evolution without any basis in time or Darwinism but instead from core truths manifested into the foundation building blocks of this world - when I was done it looked like the design for the bing bang theory - I was flipped out - I had a few cocktails that nite to calm my nerves. But I knew- Science would soon be re-writing our evolution when they discovered the missing piece - neither an atom nor photon but something new. It seemed for the next 6mos every other day I was writing down something science would soon discover or inventing something that was not invented or patent pending. As crazy as it all sounded it just felt right... Now as I was reading thru "The Groups" channeled messages and also some of Kryon's messages I began to feel uneasy maybe even a little angry - I kept coming across comments or statements regarding a hierarchy - that much emphasis was placed upon your name and how others viewed and judged you according to this and also the level of your ascension. It made absolutely no sense to me - we are all one - no one is better than the other we are all equal why isn't that resonating out there why?? I knew in order to get these answers I had to ask that question I really didn't want to ask. Who am I? I was fearful that the answer might have negative implications on this game this earth experiment and I dreaded finding out - I wanted to remain nameless I felt whatever my name was it didn't matter I remembered not because of who I was or what history may be attached to my name but for the simple reason that this is all I am - I am this and this is all, my core self, our core self - our core truth has no other choice but to ring out - how could anyone think the results would have ended differently??? How could we not rememeber??? And then it started to slowly make sense... I went down the shore to be by the water and I asked the question Who am I - I felt that I had something to do with the water - then I just started writing in Sumerian - Babylonian I later found out - Ea - Enki I felt a connection to this - Elohim I felt they were more scientific than anything and that they depended to much on there names and it's history - I felt I was related to Michael and his name was also Erra. As I looked at the water I could see thru it's vibrations it was moving so fast but I felt I could just push my way right thru it - as I looked around I noticed not everything was vibrating at the same speed - it seemed that those things I felt connected to were vibrating faster and then I understood what it means to create to manifest from non-physical to physical - a part of your core truth is taken and married with that which you want to create - it has no time it - it is neither physical or non physical but that margin in between and it becomes the foundation the building block / cornerstone of that universe/world from that the physical side can be built. I saw the beginnings of our universe - I was told you are 1 of the prodigal 7 the creators the visionaries, you were there when 7 was within 1 when 5 created water thru vibrational runoff and that was the creation of everything in this universe. I continued writing for another 2 days not really understanding what exactly anything meant until I went home and googled everything. Then I freaked out - Elohim - Intergalactic space counsel, aliens the greys and other bad guys - the atrocities committed against humans. I was scared I was disgusted I didn't understand anything or why it happened until that point I viewed the Earth as a world in a game board and although there were non-physical beings playing on the sidelines that was it that's as far as it went - now I can't even fathom how big it is or all that is in it - I had to digest this figure things out - I was scared I mean should I be looking over my shoulder is someone trying to take me out OMG I went to the bar tried to forget about all this suddenly this was a hell of allot bigger than I thought it was and it wasn't fun anymore - something’s wrong something’s really wrong I thought. As it sat it started to settle and I suddenly began to understand - this earth game was a dichotomy of the universe - the farther from the 1 things got the less things felt the one in everything. There has to be contrast in order to create - there has to be like and dislike - these so called bad guys weren't evil or wrong they were just doing there thing and if you didn't like it then you didn't have to be near them or you could create something that you liked.., I felt sad that the rest of the universe looked upon them so badly - it wasn't right they were part of us we are part of them they were adding to the creation process and were just as needed as everyone else. Then I knew I felt it I understood what this Earth game really meant how it is so much more than just a game how this will change everything how beautiful and amazing it really is I still weep when I say or think about this. It is the Law of One in its truest form WE ARE ALL ONE IN THE SAME, WE AS WE, YOU AS ME, ME AS YOU. WE COME FROM THE DARKNESS THAT REALIZED ITSELF AND BECAME 1. 1 BECAME 5. 5 WERE WITHIN 1. 1 BECAME 7. 7 WERE WITHIN 1 AND SO FORTH UNTIL INFINITY. WE ARE EVERYTHING AND AT ITS CORE EVERYTHING IS US
Then I realized remembering who I was who I am only further solidifies this theory - as part of being in the physical on this Earth you are given the feeling of a strong sense of individuality and you feel less connected to the one - having a name, history, genealogy is a good thing you would think but even though I didn't know why I had such a strong sense of remaining nameless that it shouldn't matter - I had no problem sacrificing myself even though I didn't know who I was so others could continue forward and win this game. Of course these fears were unfounded and just a part of being human but still my core self my truth rang thru and its incredible. I still prefer to remain nameless if not only to myself.
So all this lead me to Ra and the Law of One - the Doctrine of 7 Stanzas - Madame Blavatsky and so many other things I never even knew existed. The following is what I wrote a week after I learned all this. I don't think I am Ea or any other person re-incarnated at all - I feel that they are a part of me somehow but being in the physical it's just hard for me to completely understand how. I also don't think I was the only one playing this game or that I was the pivotal player and with out me things would have turned out differently - it is just written like that it's easier for me to understand it while being in the physical.
A nice reminder
About a week after my Bday after I digested all that new/remembered information pertaining to who I was I began to get a better understanding of it all. This was one letter that I wrote down from my higher self, Michael, George and other family and friends chimed in.
Let us tell you now so you can add this feeling to your core self. It is as much a part of you as you are of it.
You have built mountains changed worlds changed the course of mankind which in turn is redirecting the whole oneness of this universe back into itself. This universe is part of many which in turn is part of all - it has been born and reborn and will once again go thru that cycle. Each time keeping within itself the memory of it's past so it will be part of another future. Everything comes from 1 to infinity and then back to 1 to rest, sleep digest, and contemplate the new oneness of it. Then to be reborn again-spitting back out again and again while adding and morphing new revelations. This is what it is. It is all. It is life. It is everything separate but working as one. Creating new ideas and revelations in its separateness and keeping only what is true to itself by releasing everything else. This is the true idea of oneness, the ability to create separately but keeping only that which is true to all. All is all - we as we -1 in 9 - 9 in 1. You carry - you are - all that encompasses this. You are 1 of the 5, 1 in 5, 5 in 9, and 9 in 1 at the beginning of each new universe you carry with you the strength the feeling of this oneness. You carry this out and with reminding all thru its course that we as we all is all 1 is 1. Especially when new creations begin to get so far beyond this understanding-they begin to lack any concept of that - leading towards fewer keepers and more idea/creations being released. This is where we are now-in this universe -our expansion so great that our ideology is stretched and the oneness is forgotten by most leading to new ideas of little interest to all. But there are some extraordinary new revelations in this universe and you see understand before most the potential and expounded impact these will have on all future universes. So you see how funny it is to us that you doubt your ability to create and manifest when you've manifested universes and worlds within them! Oh this Earth Game this earth experiment is truly an original. Never has anything like this been done. To intentionally strip ourselves of ourselves - you saw this immediately -the whole picture/the idea - most of us still see it as a game and the ripple effects haven't been felt yet. Our own realization - the realization of this universe as being one will once gain rock thru all. So you see although you can't remember you have been a key player in this game you always knew your core self - at pivotal points in many different forms/characters you showed your truth, the truth shined so brightly that many were able to remember or at least to feel a higher purpose .You worked the game from the playing field and Michael as a spectator - between you both you made sure it was able to be played out. You both new from the beginning what potential this had beyond just a game and as the game went on so did so many others. So you created sides but in the form of teams - now some of the players and spectators are on opposing sides of you because they don't want to remember they like there individuality they are afraid they will get lost in the one not understanding that more than anything they will be more noticed more appreciated and loved. This is just fear a common factor in all the Universes. But this Game brings it to another level to turn fear into understanding. Now you are you, we are we, all is all, you are no more important than the farthest out least remembering of the oneness being- because as you bring the strength of an original creator they bring the strength of ever changing ideas/perceptions and the ability to create new realities that you being so close to the oneness wouldn't couldn't even imagine. So both are needed just as much they bring the life altering universal changing ideas and perceptions - you bring the ability to spot and nurture these ideas so they will be carried into the next universe.
,,. now this is from my blog which after much thought and contemplation I finally decided how I should sign my name - By Me - I thought that was clever - I didn't want to use my name now or any other names from the past so I thought by Me that sums up all my past. Oh how clever I thought I was - then I find out the ME is a Doctrine held by EA pertaining to the holy powers and how to make heaven on earth. Then I knew that "clever me" wasn't as clever as "clever me" and that I must think I'm a real riot fucking hilarious - oh I'll out clever clever [/u]me just you wait and see the battle has only just begun!!! And this brings me to trying to get a jump on things that may happen to me in the future - so far I've failed miserable - if it wasn't for Google I'd be so lost!!
The last thing I did and then found out later there were websites warning that this may happen but once again I was to late I just had to find out the hard way - Solar Flares and there effects on me - I feel the ground moving - so fatigued - dizzy drained I just want to watch TV and veg out - I knew it wasn't depression and I knew I needed down time what I didn't know was that it was happening and there were ways to cope - 2 - I needed to ground myself so I wouldn't go flying off and getting lost inter-dimensionally - did that what a scare - for me and the other people in that other dimension - we were all freaked until I finally figured it out - Oh I've got to ground myself in my dimension so I don't go flying around with no way to get back luckily I knew to think of something in my dimension that I didn't see in there's and bam I was back....and lastly changing my past this was a complete surprise but a nice one - I literally faced my Demons - after drawing a picture of what I thought was the demon from my childhood that made my room turn red and watched me from the doorway - I realized the closest thing it looked like was Mothman and I know it wasn't Mothman so after hours of perusing-demon images on the web I went another rout - I always thought it had something to do with Native Americans - so I researched what tribes where on the land I grew up on then looked into there mythology to see if they had any demons that matched - what I found was one item " Wallum Ollum" as I clicked the link I saw " The Red Record" I thought here we go!!! The Red Record is the oldest ancient doctrine of the Native American people - it is the Lenne-Lenape story of creation dating back to 10,000 BC - WHAT?! So there was no demon it was only the Lenni - Lenape trying to tell me there story of creation and at the top of the page there's a picture of my demon an American Indian in full garb and head gear - Catholic Religion once again putting fear into my head ha haaaaa... yes you bet that completely changes much of my past unbelievable....
So 10-10-10 what should I expect anything - I feel I have a chance of actually knowing what's happening to me while it’s happening.
Please help me stay ahead of the game at least just this once!
Thank you
Deb