07-16-2020, 10:14 AM
Hello Elle. Time to raise the bar once again. I'm glad you've been holding pretty well up to this point, though now I guess I'll strike a nerve or two. Bear in mind that I did read your whole post in the adequate context of what you wrote, however for the sake of linguistics: have you ever stopped to wonder why you use the words you use to communicate to others? The terms you employ? The nouns, adjectives, and the structuring of your sentences? Well, now it's a great time to check it out:
What about your feelings?
Your narrative reminds me of the following lyrics:
"You gotta keep one eye looking over your shoulder
You know it's going to get harder, and harder, and harder as you get older"
The way you over-analyze and over-do things all by yourself, almost single-handedly using your "engine", your logic. You even term yourself as an engine instead of a biological organism. Have you ever considered that, no matter how endless you might be, you're actually small?
"And when you lose control, you'll reap the harvest you have sown
And as the fear grows, the bad blood slows and turns to stone"
How long will you be able to hold tight the reins of your own sea of pain?
"And it's too late to lose the weight you used to need to throw around
So have a good drown, as you go down, all alone
Dragged down by the stone"
Hey, it's easier to blame something for our dismay: be it "Confusion Principle", "Pre-Incarnative Choices", "Immutable Human Nature", "The Government", "Aliens", "Earth's Quarantine", "Intergalactic War", etc.
This way it's easier for your rational self to just keep functioning well.
"I gotta admit that I'm a little bit confused
Sometimes it seems to me as if I'm just being used
Gotta stay awake, gotta try and shake off this creeping malaise
If I don't stand my own ground, how can I find my way out of this maze?"
Are you just a "part" of the "whole"? Are you just a displaceable, disposable piece of a bigger clockwork that is human society? How hard (and for how long) are you willing to "put up a fight"? A fight that seems to be completely lost, for helping the lady at the grocery store won't prevent the suffering inflicted by humankind, in general, to keep occurring to other humans and even to animal life, such as to the bird you aided?
How long will you be fit enough to provide for society before you're replaced by a younger, more suitable person? How long will you be remembered until you're forgotten by those that allegedly love you?
"Deaf, dumb, and blind, you just keep on pretending
That everyone's expendable and no-one has a real friend
And it seems to you the thing to do would be to isolate the winner
And everything's done under the sun
And you believe at heart, everyone's a killer"
Feel free to spare yourself of egoistic retorts, such as "but I don't think like this" and such. We're here to show you ideas, not to argue about their applicability in anyone's specific life; after all, it's just the lyrics of a song.
"Who was born in a house full of pain
Who was trained not to spit in the fan
Who was told what to do by the man
Who was broken by trained personnel
Who was fitted with collar and chain
Who was given a pat on the back
Who was breaking away from the pack
Who was only a stranger at home
Who was ground down in the end
Who was found dead on the phone
Who was dragged down by the stone"
Out of pain you were born; out of pain you were forged;
You were tamed by society, whether peacefully or by force;
Collar and chain shackled you, as you had begun to break away from the pack of sheep that numbingly, though euphorically, march towards the slaughterhouse to be harvested, to be food;
You were rewarded for behaving like expected from you and your assigned roles;
After all is said and done, you're a stranger at your own home, be it the seat of your body or the seat of your spirit;
In the end, the pain that you felt crushed you down; you can barely speak out your burdens, your weights.
That stone that you're becoming should drag you down the depths of the sea of your suppressed feelings, to drown you away.
That is a great question. From my own perspective and in the best of my capability, I can tell you:
"Because I ain't a just being."
I don't even think human beings in general, however hard they try, whether alone or collectively, will ever be able to achieve a state of true justice. The most we can do is recognize our own fallibility, our own truckload of shortcomings, and turn ourselves to The Source, The True Source Of It All, and offer the little we have to provide: our plethora of inconsistencies, of misjudgments, of not-so-great intentions, of not-so-great actions, of not-so-great service.
Well, after you described your "internal engine parts", I sincerely doubt you whole-heartedly and 100% forgive both yourself and others; likewise with acceptance and understanding, not to mention love.
People impose their wills upon each other all the time. People have their liberty withtaken from them all the time, from innocent people being condemned for uncommitted crimes to slavery and abuse of all kinds. Do you believe in free will?
Are you aware that regardless of what you think or protest against, such a certain abuse in life, some people will simply say that "you actually chose it before you incarnated".
I'll ask you again: do you sincerely believe in free will?
If you're a fish and know how to swim but doesn't know how to walk, how do you expect to describe what legs feel like? Still, I'll try to answer:
The Source is that what is before and after the silence, before the beginning and after the end, the everlasting cause of itself, that which words, music, monuments, and even birth itself pale in comparison to the magnitude of what It is. Still, It is closer to you than your fastest thought; It stands out by unfathomable magnitudes the most distant, far-fetched, and the most powerful thought, feeling, act or whatever should one conjecture.
Yet! It is to you as both the Perfect Mother and the Perfect Father is to a child, should it only have the humility and the courage to turn towards It, such child's would be undefeatable and such child's fate would irrevocably be brimming with victory.
(07-15-2020, 06:44 PM)Elle Wrote: The tools I have are what I describe as my internal engine: experience, logic, reason and emotion.
What about your feelings?
(07-15-2020, 06:44 PM)Elle Wrote: Why should I do my best to forgive everyone else in my life and not myself?
(07-15-2020, 06:44 PM)Elle Wrote: Why I am not allowed to make mistakes and still be accepted just like I do for others?
(07-15-2020, 06:44 PM)Elle Wrote: [...]so my logic dictated that[...]
(07-15-2020, 06:44 PM)Elle Wrote: I’m really no different from anyone else.
Your narrative reminds me of the following lyrics:
"You gotta keep one eye looking over your shoulder
You know it's going to get harder, and harder, and harder as you get older"
The way you over-analyze and over-do things all by yourself, almost single-handedly using your "engine", your logic. You even term yourself as an engine instead of a biological organism. Have you ever considered that, no matter how endless you might be, you're actually small?
"And when you lose control, you'll reap the harvest you have sown
And as the fear grows, the bad blood slows and turns to stone"
How long will you be able to hold tight the reins of your own sea of pain?
"And it's too late to lose the weight you used to need to throw around
So have a good drown, as you go down, all alone
Dragged down by the stone"
- Would you rather wait to grow older to just then realize that you lived a half-life?
- Who doesn't try to break away from this crippling dis-ease of the inaptitude of human society?
- Who doesn't numb their selves with avalanches of esoteric material, with over-work, over-sleep, over-meditation, over-fantasies?
- Who doesn't try, in vain, to flee from their own reflected image with all kinds of "all is well" and logical rigmaroles?
- Who doesn't try, in vain, to escape from their own torment with fear-inducing speeches, such as the imminence of a new calamity, of an alien outburst, of global collapse?
- Who doesn't, futilely, to safeguard their own afflicted self with esoteric, scientific, astrological, cosmic, Pleiadian, Arcturian, intra-terrestrial, entrepreneurial, or whatever mind-numbing-distracting activities you choose?
Hey, it's easier to blame something for our dismay: be it "Confusion Principle", "Pre-Incarnative Choices", "Immutable Human Nature", "The Government", "Aliens", "Earth's Quarantine", "Intergalactic War", etc.
This way it's easier for your rational self to just keep functioning well.
"I gotta admit that I'm a little bit confused
Sometimes it seems to me as if I'm just being used
Gotta stay awake, gotta try and shake off this creeping malaise
If I don't stand my own ground, how can I find my way out of this maze?"
Are you just a "part" of the "whole"? Are you just a displaceable, disposable piece of a bigger clockwork that is human society? How hard (and for how long) are you willing to "put up a fight"? A fight that seems to be completely lost, for helping the lady at the grocery store won't prevent the suffering inflicted by humankind, in general, to keep occurring to other humans and even to animal life, such as to the bird you aided?
How long will you be fit enough to provide for society before you're replaced by a younger, more suitable person? How long will you be remembered until you're forgotten by those that allegedly love you?
"Deaf, dumb, and blind, you just keep on pretending
That everyone's expendable and no-one has a real friend
And it seems to you the thing to do would be to isolate the winner
And everything's done under the sun
And you believe at heart, everyone's a killer"
Feel free to spare yourself of egoistic retorts, such as "but I don't think like this" and such. We're here to show you ideas, not to argue about their applicability in anyone's specific life; after all, it's just the lyrics of a song.
"Who was born in a house full of pain
Who was trained not to spit in the fan
Who was told what to do by the man
Who was broken by trained personnel
Who was fitted with collar and chain
Who was given a pat on the back
Who was breaking away from the pack
Who was only a stranger at home
Who was ground down in the end
Who was found dead on the phone
Who was dragged down by the stone"
Out of pain you were born; out of pain you were forged;
You were tamed by society, whether peacefully or by force;
Collar and chain shackled you, as you had begun to break away from the pack of sheep that numbingly, though euphorically, march towards the slaughterhouse to be harvested, to be food;
You were rewarded for behaving like expected from you and your assigned roles;
After all is said and done, you're a stranger at your own home, be it the seat of your body or the seat of your spirit;
In the end, the pain that you felt crushed you down; you can barely speak out your burdens, your weights.
That stone that you're becoming should drag you down the depths of the sea of your suppressed feelings, to drown you away.
(07-15-2020, 06:44 PM)Elle Wrote: “Why go on? Why not just end yourself?”
That is a great question. From my own perspective and in the best of my capability, I can tell you:
"Because I ain't a just being."
I don't even think human beings in general, however hard they try, whether alone or collectively, will ever be able to achieve a state of true justice. The most we can do is recognize our own fallibility, our own truckload of shortcomings, and turn ourselves to The Source, The True Source Of It All, and offer the little we have to provide: our plethora of inconsistencies, of misjudgments, of not-so-great intentions, of not-so-great actions, of not-so-great service.
(07-15-2020, 06:44 PM)Elle Wrote: [...]forgiveness, acceptance and understanding (love) of myself and others combined with my internal engine to make choices in any given scenario.
Well, after you described your "internal engine parts", I sincerely doubt you whole-heartedly and 100% forgive both yourself and others; likewise with acceptance and understanding, not to mention love.
(07-15-2020, 06:44 PM)Elle Wrote: I imposed my will on another person, which is something I find much discomfort in doing, as I believe in free will; however, my sense of reason in this scenario dictates to me that this act of tyranny was the right thing to do.
People impose their wills upon each other all the time. People have their liberty withtaken from them all the time, from innocent people being condemned for uncommitted crimes to slavery and abuse of all kinds. Do you believe in free will?
Are you aware that regardless of what you think or protest against, such a certain abuse in life, some people will simply say that "you actually chose it before you incarnated".
I'll ask you again: do you sincerely believe in free will?
(07-15-2020, 06:44 PM)Elle Wrote: I’m not sure what you mean by this. Could you describe what you call The Source?
If you're a fish and know how to swim but doesn't know how to walk, how do you expect to describe what legs feel like? Still, I'll try to answer:
The Source is that what is before and after the silence, before the beginning and after the end, the everlasting cause of itself, that which words, music, monuments, and even birth itself pale in comparison to the magnitude of what It is. Still, It is closer to you than your fastest thought; It stands out by unfathomable magnitudes the most distant, far-fetched, and the most powerful thought, feeling, act or whatever should one conjecture.
Yet! It is to you as both the Perfect Mother and the Perfect Father is to a child, should it only have the humility and the courage to turn towards It, such child's would be undefeatable and such child's fate would irrevocably be brimming with victory.